Page 92 of Clinically Awkward

Despite everything, I had to bite back a laugh.

Vivian looked as if she were caught between mortification and hysterical laughter.

Winnie looked furious.

And Colton looked confused.

“Colton,” Vivian tried again. “Can we please?”

“Babe, hold on,” Colton said, still focused on Fitz. “This guy just accused me of⁠—”

“Being a wanker?” Fitz supplied helpfully. “Yes, I did. And I stand by it.”

“Fitz!” Winnie snapped. “I don’t need you to⁠—”

“Of course you don’t, darling,” Fitz said. “You’re perfectly capable of handling this yourself. But that doesn’t mean you should have to. This is your workplace. You deserve to feel safe and respected here.”

“I do feel safe!”

“Wonderful. Then my work here is done.” Fitz turned back to Colton with a smile. “No hard feelings, mate?”

Colton looked baffled. “I... what?”

“I said, no hard feelings.” Fitz clapped him on the shoulder. “Look, I can see you’re a decent bloke who perhaps just doesn’t realize when he’s coming on a bit strong. It happens. Especially with you American types. All that confidence and none of the self-awareness.”

“I have self-awareness,” Colton protested.

“Do you?” Fitz asked. “Because you walked into a medical clinic at closing time, ignored your girlfriend’s attempts to speak with you, and instead decided to chat up the receptionist about cable machines.”

Colton blinked. “When you put it like that.”

“It sounds rather dreadful, doesn’t it?”

“I mean⁠—”

“But!” Fitz said brightly. “I’m willing to overlook it. Because I suspect the real issue here is that you’re simply not very good at reading social cues. Which, coincidentally, is something I’ve been accused of myself on numerous occasions.”

“You have?” Colton asked.

“Oh, constantly,” Fitz said. “Women are terribly complicated, aren’t they? Always expecting us to know what they’re thinking without actually telling us.”

I saw Winnie’s eye twitch.

Vivian looked as if she was about to explode.

And Fitz just kept talking.

“Take Winifred here, for example,” he continued. “Lovely girl. Absolutely brilliant at her job. But does she ever just say what she’s thinking? No. She gives you these looks—these absolutely withering looks—like I’m supposed to just know what they mean.”

“I am standing right here,” Winnie said dangerously.

“Yes, darling, I’m aware,” Fitz said. “And you’re doing that thing with your face again. See?” He gestured to Colton. “This is exactly what I’m talking about.”

Colton actually nodded. “Yeah, I know what you mean. Vivian does that too.”

“Does she?” Fitz asked with interest.

“All the time! Like, I’ll be telling her about my workout, and she gets this look like⁠—”