Page 109 of Clinically Awkward

The homeless man blinked at him. “You’re in jail,” he said.

“Irrelevant!” Fitz declared loudly. “Jail is a state of being, not an excuse for poor grooming.”

Winnie closed her eyes. “I’m going to kill him.”

“Get in line,” I muttered as Quinton looked up and saw us. His face went through several emotions in rapid succession: relief, fear, shame, and something that looked suspiciously like please help me.

“Vivian,” he said weakly.

“Quinton,” I said, my voice dangerously calm.

“I can explain.”

“Can you?”

“No,” he admitted. “Not really. It all happened very fast.”

“Did it?”

“Colton punched me.”

I raised an eyebrow. “And?”

“And then I tackled him.”

“Naturally.”

“And then Nathan tried to pull me off, but Colton’s elbow hit Nathan, and Nathan accidentally shoved Hayden.”

“I didn’t mean to!” Nathan protested from the bench.

“—and Hayden knocked over someone’s table, and that guy shoved Hayden, and Fitz shoved that guy⁠—”

“He attacked Hayden, an elderly man!” Fitz interjected, finally turning away from the homeless man. “I was defending his honor!”

“I’M FORTY-EIGHT,” Hayden yelled.

“—and then it was just chaos,” Quinton finished. “Complete chaos.”

I looked at Winnie. Winnie looked at me. “I’m getting the shovel,” she said.

“I’ll help you dig,” I replied.

“WINNIE,” Fitz said, his face lighting up like he had just seen the sun after a month of rain. “You came! I knew you would. I told Quinton you’d come. Didn’t I tell you, Quinton?”

“You did,” Quinton confirmed miserably.

“See? I have complete faith in you, darling. You’re absolutely magnificent in a crisis. Terrifying, but magnificent.”

“Fitz,” Winnie said, her voice deadly calm. “I am going to leave you here.”

His smile faltered. “What?”

“I am going to turn around, walk out of this building, get in my car, and leave you here to rot.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“I absolutely mean that.”