Page 85 of Grumpy Bear

“Sure.” I actually wasn’t sure what that meant, exactly. That he wanted to be here. My body vibrated with the need to get my hands on him, to confirm what I hoped, but playing it cool seemed to be working. I was fairly certain I could speak without sobbing.

“I’m so sorry you drove all the way to Atlanta.” His frown was apologetic and unnecessarily mortified. “I’ve got to get my fucking phone turned back on.”

“They were supposed to tell you. Brad and that producer guy. I thought maybe you got the hell out of there to avoid seeing me.” I attempted a laugh, like the thought was absurd, but it was the honest truth.

“Oh, God. Fuck no.” Luke took a few steps toward me like he wanted to reach out and stop me from stumbling off a cliff. “I didn’t know. They didn’t tell me. They wanted to film it and make it part of the show. Catch me being authentically surprised.” He rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, that’s what he said. I didn’t hang around for a long explanation.”

Luke sighed. “I don’t think their intentions were malicious at all, just…” He made a flailing gesture that was part shrug.

“Hollywood bullshit?”

And there was his smile. “Yeah.”

The relief of knowing it was possible he would smile at me again hauled me a few more feet to safety. “You weren’t as down for all that as you thought you might be?”

“No, I’m really not.” He shook his head, but his smile remained. “I should have quit while I was ahead. Or not quit.”

I rubbed the back of my neck. “I’m confused about what you’re quitting.”

Full, unguarded Luke-ness returned to his expression. “Didn’t you ever wonder why Dorothy wanted to get home so bad? I was always like, what the hell? Black-and-white Kansas sucks. Why wouldn’t you be like, this place is amazing! I’m not going back there. But then, maybe all that Technicolor plastic was only cool at first, and it wasn’t something you’d want to wake up to every day.”

“Luke.”

“Yeah?”

I couldn’t keep the grin off my face. “You’re babbling.”

“Sawyer!” Jim’s head popped up over the counter. “This boy is trying to pour his heart out to you using a classic reference from The Wizard of Oz—”

“Yeah, Glinda. I got it.”

“The symbolism of the ruby slippers is—”

I rounded on him, spreading my hands. “What the fuck, Jim? Can we have a moment of privacy, please? Thank you. Jeez.”

There was a jingle of dog tags and the soft thump of a door closing as Jim led Karen Walker out back.

“Sorry about the metaphors,” Luke murmured.

“Are you trying to tell me there’s no place like Bear Camp?” I grinned, but he remained serious.

“There’s not. But the place is only secondary.” He came closer. “I missed you guys. I missed you. It’s you I can’t bear to lose my chance with.”

His eyes looked dangerously watery. If he started crying… I clenched my jaw and took a deep breath through my nose. “Hey. You’re not losing me.” I put my hands on his shoulders. “You took a couple days off, went to an audition, it didn’t pan out. Fuck it. Now you’re home.”

“Am I?” He was so pitiful, so lost.

I pulled him to my chest and his face lodged against my neck. I found it was easier to speak without watching his hazel eyes tear up. “I should have made it clear you could come back no matter what happened. We all missed you too. We want you here. I want you here.” He pulled away so he could look for the truth of my words in my eyes. I let him see that I meant it. I’d let him look into me as long as he wanted. When the first fat tear finally escaped and dropped off his cheek, I panicked a little bit. My first impulse was to distract him, to make him happy again. “And, uh, it just so happens I got you a welcome home present.” I left him long enough to grab the guitar.

“You shouldn’t have done this.” When Luke smiled, more tears spilled out. “My God, this case is beautiful.”

“The case is not the present. Well, it’s part of it.”

“It’s a really nice case. Nice bow too.”

“Just fucking open it.”