Page 118 of Falcon’s Forever

She curls onto the other side carefully, looking absurdly young in the dark, not because she is, but because fear has a way of stripping years off people. I switch off the lamp, and for a few minutes we just listen to the compound. Her breathing slows.

“Cara?” Emily says quietly.

I turn toward her. “Yes?”

“You don’t have to look after me forever.”

I stare into the darkness. “I know that.”

“Do you?” she asks.

I smile despite everything. “Go to sleep.”

“Bossy,” she mutters.

“Learned it from Falcon.”

Emily settles deeper into the cushions. “That’s worrying.”

Her breathing quietens, and eventually she sleeps. I don't fall asleep straight away. Her words stay with me, sitting in my chest. You don't have to look after me forever.

I understand the message. For years I've been taking care of other people because it's easier than working out what I need. The women needed routines, appointments, someone who remembered which doors made them panic and which sounds they couldn't tolerate. I became useful, and useful has always felt safe. Useful means nobody looks too closely at what's happening underneath.

Falcon does the same thing in a different shape. He makes himself useful with weapons and strategy and sacrifice. Maybe neither of us knows how to exist without earning our place by carrying something.

That thought stays with me until morning.

By seven Emily's still asleep and my shoulder's gone numb from wherever she migrated to during the night. I slide out carefully. She mumbles something rude at me.

The hallway's quiet when I step out, and I'm halfway to the kitchen when I hear voices from downstairs. Male voices, more than two of them, and one of them's Falcon's. I recognize it before I've processed anything else. I should keep walking. I stop instead, at the top of the stairs, not exactly to eavesdrop, who am I kidding, mostly to eavesdrop a little.

"We can cover the safe house without increasing visible patrol," Zip's saying.

"And if Merrick moves?" Vulture.

"Then we respond."

Falcon, next. "No. If Merrick moves, we confirm what they're moving toward first."

A pause.

"You think they're setting another pull," Vulture says.

"I think every move they've made so far is tried to split us. They hit the warehouse to see what we'd do. Used the prescription run to pull officers off the property. Tested the fence last night to see if we'd chase."

"You think they'd try it this fast?" Zip asks.

"Yes." No hesitation at all. "Because eventually they expect us to get angry enough to stop thinking."

Something in my chest goes tight, hearing him name the trap out loud instead of walking straight into it.

"No solo moves," Falcon says. "Nobody follows anything outside the perimeter without approval. If they want us out, they come to us."

Zip laughs, quiet. "Who are you and what did you do with Falcon?"

"Fuck off."

"What about you?" Vulture asks, and the silence that follows is different than the rest of the conversation.