Page 55 of Thaw My Heart

“This isn’t how I thought you’d want to spend your first day as Ranch Manager,” Hudson says. Curls of blonde hair peek out underneath his tan cowboy hat. “Congratulations, by the way,” he smiles.

I nod in thanks. How was I supposed to spend it? Curled up in Cole’s office? Office life isn’t my style. Neither are finances. “I think I’d rather spend my days on the roof than face everything else.”

He’s silent for a moment, staring at the gravel as we walk. “Yeah, I know the feeling,” he murmurs.

It never occurred to me until now that Hudson was likely quiet because he was going through his own brand of shit. Suffer in silence, as they say.

“You do?”

“We’ve all got shit we don’t want to face,” he replies. “But the longer we keep ignoring things, the worse it gets. You know?”

“Yeah, maybe.” But ignoring things is where I’m most comfortable. My defense mechanism for the past two years.

“All of us predicted you’d take over someday.”

I huff a laugh. “Is that right?”

“You were meant for this place, Kit.” Hudson’s warm eyes meet mine, and I smile, a genuine smile that hurts from the number of frowns I’ve been giving lately.

We enter the main barn, dropping off the tools in the storage room, when Ryker’s voice comes up behind me.

“Well, looky here. Our new Ranch Manager,” Ryker grins. The shirt underneath his jacket is covered in dirt and sweat, leading to worn leather black chaps from spending the day in the fields. “How does it feel to have all that power, boss?”

I glance at my watch. “It looks like you still have thirty minutes left on the clock. Get moving.”

He frowns, walking away. Hudson chuckles.

I turn to head back to the office, where my other duties await, finding Sadie talking to Blake. Everything around me freezes in place.

She laughs at something he says, and my stomach drops. Her hair is braided to the side, brushing against a worn jean jacket. Light jeans tight to her perfect curves, with one side tucked into her boots while the other hangs out. Messy, but she owns it. And she looks… happy.

I hate the way it makes me feel.

Blake catches my stare, waving at me.

“You alright?” Hudson asks.

I forgot he was still standing there. “Fine,” I mutter.

By the time Sadie turns towards me, I’m gone, heading the other way out of the barn, pulling out a cigarette as I turn the corner—welcoming the sweet and sick relief. Trying to ignore the ache in my heart.

Three days pass by in a blur. My new role as Ranch Manager has me working crazy long hours, which has been good to keep myself distracted—to keep myself from the pain and confusion that radiates whenever I think of Sadie. I don’t want this new role, but I’m digging myself into it, doing more than necessary to keep myself busy.

To honor Cole’s wishes.

Bandit’s been going to work with me, so he’s not stuck at home by himself. Most nights end with exhaustion, curled up on the sofa in Cole’s office, too tired to make the seven-minute drive home. I’ve also been making a point not to notice Sadie, keeping my distance from her and our houses that are too close together. And although my eyes betray me when she’s near, the most interaction we’ve had in days is half-assed greetings.

The weather in Aspen Hollow is worse, with dark clouds hovering over the mountains, choking the light. Thin ice begins to form on the lakes and rivers, but with a few more days of grey and no sun, the ice will be permanent until the spring.

But the frigid air biting my nose is nothing compared to the ice that’s formed around my heart—the frozen feeling inside my chest.

My truck glides to a stop in my driveway.

Bandit sits quietly in the passenger’s seat, waiting for me to open the door. Night cloaks everything in sight, save for the porch lights glowing in the snowy haze. Snow crunches under my boots with each step towards my door.

“Hey,” she greets me in the darkness, but it’s not her normal cheery voice as she leans against her vintage blue Ford truck. Looking like she’s waiting for something…

Or someone.