Page 22 of Princess and Country

We stared at each other for a beat, the magnetic pull between us stronger than it had ever been before.

He raked his fingers through his hair, messing it up.

I turned around to face him, a small smile curving my lips. “Here. Let me.”

I rose to the tips of my toes, and in the same way I’d always done with Carter, I combed Jeff’s hair back in place with my fingers. This time the feelings were different. My breath caught in my lungs. Warm jitters ran through me. Jeff stopped breathing too. He cradled my face with his hands, his irises darkening. His stare traveled between my eyes and lips.

“Not here,” I said, my voice uneven. Jeff lowered his head and nodded. I wouldn’t risk anyone taking a picture of us and Carter seeing it. I wasn’t ready for this.

I gripped the lapel of his jacket, finding my balance. My knees wobbled, and with his hands clutching my waist, Jeff held me up.

My lips quivered.

They were dying to be kissed again. Just once more.

Jeff blew out a long breath and cleared his throat. “Let’s go. I want to dance with you.” Never letting go of his hand, I followed him to the dance floor.

The night passed in a blur. Jeff and I were in our own little bubble. We spent too much time dancing, the need to be in each other’s arms growing bigger and stronger with each passing hour.

When we pulled into my driveway, something deflated inside me. I wasn’t ready for the night to end.

“I’ll walk you to your door,” Jeff said, his voice husky. It sent shivers to my core. I curled my hand around his nape and pulled him forward. When our lips touched, I came alive. His scent invaded my nostrils.

We broke apart, breathless.

“Carter can’t know,” I said, tears burning the back of my eyes. “I’m not sure he’ll be okay with this,” I said, gesturing to the two of us with my free hand.

“I know. I don’t want him to feel left out.” Jeff let out a long breath. “But I’m having a hard time staying away from you, Princess. I know we shouldn’t, but somehow, it feels right. So damn right.” Goosebumps blossomed on my skin. My heart raced in my chest. Butterflies flew around in my tummy.

“Let’s take it slow and see where it’s going before saying anything, okay?” Pressing his forehead against mine, Jeff sighed.

“Yeah. But seeing you every day and not being able to kiss you will be the worst kind of torture.” He wrapped his arms around my back, and I sank my head in his chest, the beating of his heart the only music I would ever need. “We won’t go behind his back. It wouldn’t be right. But we’ll figure this out. Do you trust me?” I bobbed my head, still buried in his chest. Warm tears rolled down my cheeks. I wiped them off with my fingertips. “We’ll give him time—”

I said nothing, fighting the sobs bubbling in my throat. Jeff leaned back and tilted my head with one finger.

“Hey, what’s wrong? Talk to me.”

“Do you think Carter will forgive us one day? I don’t want to lose him. He’s been my best friend forever. I love him. And I’d never do anything to hurt him.”

“I know. He might be upset at first, but he loves us both, and we love him. I’m sure we can find a way to make it work.” I heard him swallow. “I need to ask you something, though. Are you in love with my brother?”

I locked my eyes on Jeff’s and shook my head. “No. I love him. I do. A lot. But I’m not in love with him, even if he’s the most important person in my life. Other than—” A sob escaped my mouth and drowned my words.

Jeff dried my tears with his thumbs. “Don’t cry, Princess. I feel hopeless when you’re sad.” I pressed my cheek against his warm palm. Our eyes met. Again. Like a force bigger than us was pulling us toward each other.

Jeff brought his mouth back on mine, his teeth toying with my shuddering bottom lip.

Once inside, after Jeff kissed me goodnight—half a dozen times—I leaned my back against the front door and let go of all the air lodged in my lungs. Mama turned on the light in the kitchen and neared me, her eyes full of concern.

“Sweetie, are you okay?” She closed the distance between us and enveloped me in a much-needed hug. Her hair, a darker shade of red than mine, tickled my face. I breathed her in. She smelled like cinnamon rolls. Had she been baking all night? Tears ran down my cheeks. Her scent reminded me of Jeff’s.

With my face pressed against her chest, my head motioned yes. Then a no.

A long-buried sob exited my mouth.

“What’s wrong?” I snorted, unable to tell her everything going on inside me. “Oh, baby. It’s okay.” She caressed my hair with her fingers. The same way she did when I was sad as a little girl.

“Mama—” My throat was dry, my mouth pasty.

“You love him?”

After a brief hesitation, trying to put words onto my feelings, I let out a throaty “Yes.”

“And you’re scared to break Carter’s heart?”

I snorted and nodded again. How could Mama know so much about how troubled my heart was?

“It was meant to happen someday, sweetie. Those two boys are both head over heels in love with you. That much is obvious. But you can’t be in love with both. As your mama, I know where your heart stands. And I also know Carter will be heartbroken. But when he sees you and Jeff together, one day he’ll understand. You both are doing a poor job of hiding your attraction. Carter's feelings blind him. But soon he’ll see what we all see. He’ll come around. Give him some time to heal. Be gentle with his heart. It’s precious. That boy wears his emotions like a second skin. That’s why he’s such a talented songwriter. Be there for him when he needs you and give him some space when he needs it, okay?”

“Yeah,” I said, the soreness in my throat sharper. “Thanks, Mama.”

She kissed the top of my head and kept her arms around me for a long time, rocking me to peace.