Page 54 of Pink and Country

“Okay, then. Let’s gear up.”

I burst out laughing. “It’s a bit more complicated than that. We need to rent you a board and boots first. Go get changed, and meet me in the truck, I’ll get my board ready.”

The lesson lasted half a day. My entire body ached to touch hers. My hands locked on April’s waist, helping her with her balance. It wasn’t much, but it fulfilled some of my touch-April needs. With a reluctant smile and a high dose of trust in me, she held on to me with a death grip. We exchanged heated stares, and I forced myself to think about olives, a fruit I hated, and gooey snails, a mollusk that grossed me out. Focused, April chewed on her lower lip, and it almost pushed me over the edge. Relax, Carter. My roommate had a way of enchanting me. All of me. I jumped up and down, faking I was cold, to release the tension in my body and loosen the crotch of my pants.

“I did it. Carter, I did it.” April made a few turns without falling and jumped into my arms when I stopped next to her, ecstatic, her feet still strapped to the board. My level of pride skyrocketed to outer space.

We held on to each other for a bit too long, unable to break apart.

I breathed her in. Lavender. And mint lip gloss.

Another wall around my heart crumbled, leaving it exposed.

“I’m fucking proud of you.” I lifted April from the ground and spun her around. My finger brushed her lips when I put her down, but I stepped back and broke the spell. “Let’s go again.”

* * *

“Tomorrow, we’re leaving for Nashville, but what about ice skating today? You can get some writing done because we’ll go in the afternoon,” I said to April as we were finishing breakfast, sitting side by side at the kitchen island, in sweats, and bare feet, half of April’s hair tied in some sort of knot on the top of her head, and her eyes still half-masted from sleep.

“I’m not a very athletic person, HN. Don’t be too optimistic here.”

“You’ll be fine. I’ll be right there beside you the entire time. I’ll hold your hand.”

Ice skating was another one of April’s first times. I wanted them all. All her first times.

And her lasts.

With a panicked look in her eyes, April clung to my hand, draining it of blood. She looked out of her element on the ice, but after half an hour, she found her footing. I missed her touch the moment she let go of me. April glided on the surface on her own, feet apart from me, sparks of pride in her eyes. I got drunk on her laugher. And lightheaded from her lavender perfume.

“Hot chocolate?” she asked as she jumped on her feet, her rental skates removed and hanging from her hand.

“Sure, I’ll—”

“You stay here and get those off your feet,” she said, pointing to my still laced skates. “I’ll be right back. My treat.” April waltzed away, and my eyes stayed glued to her backside. Was that drool that pooled on the ground? I pinched my lips together and freed my feet from the skates.

We sat on a wooden bench, watching a teen hockey game on the second rink, a big icy rectangle. A light breeze swept our faces. I pushed strands of April’s hair behind her ear and adjusted her beanie. Families surrounded us. The ice rinks were in the middle of River Park, the largest park here in Green Mountain. Behind us, two little boys ran around, chasing each other. A husky puppy neared us. April gaped. Heat radiated through my chest in waves. Both April and I leaned forward to pet its head before its owner pulled on the leash. My eyes traveled back to the two boys, now laughing their hearts out, sitting on the ground.

“My dad played hockey all his life and could’ve made it to the pros if he hadn’t messed up his knee in college. He taught Jeff and me how to skate when we were still in diapers. We spent most of our Sunday mornings on the ice growing up. Neither Jeff nor I shared a passion for hockey like our dad, though. We loved the game, but I’ve always preferred music and words, while Jeff enjoyed building stuff. He’d never been into sports either.” A low laugh escaped my mouth.

“Did your dad encourage you to follow your dreams, or was he the kind of dad who only wanted you to follow his own?”

A small smile tugged the corner of my lips. “One winter day, I was, maybe, seven or eight. Our dad woke up Jeff and me early to go to the rink first thing in the morning. Jeff and I both begged our mom to let us go to the winter fair instead. There was a band playing and some sort of build-a-mailbox-for-Santa workshop for kids. You should have seen my dad’s face. He tried everything to discourage us. In vain. We ended up spending the day at the fair.” Almost twenty years later, that day was still fresh in my memory. “He let us follow our own path. I think the idea we’d never play hockey was a gut punch at first.” I shrugged. I hadn’t thought about my parents in quite some time. “What about your parents? Did they encourage you to follow your dreams?”

April’s smile faded. She rolled her shoulders back and inhaled. “I don’t know my parents. Never met them.”

I angled my body to face her, keeping my face neutral. “You were in foster care?” Not that it mattered.

“No. My mom’s aunt raised me. It forced me to grow up faster than any kid should. Nana was already over fifty-five when my mom left me on her front porch when I was a baby. If it hadn’t been for her, I would’ve ended up in foster care. Saunders, my best friend, the one who sent me here, is my only family. We met in college. It was love at first sight. We shared a dorm room freshman year and haven’t been apart since.” April gazed at me, a slight shade of pink coloring her cheeks. “We had little money growing up. I learned to be independent and resourceful early in life.”

My arm curled around her shoulder, and I pulled her close to me.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“It’s okay. I struggled for a long time, scared to let people in. Nana passed during my freshman year of college. Saunders and Travis, my college boyfriend, showed me I wasn’t as lonely as I thought and that I mattered to some people. It took me a while to accept their unconditional love—” April averted her gaze and toyed with the cap of her hot chocolate cup. “I’m a better person because of them. They showed me every day I was worthy of love.”

I kissed her temple, and April relaxed in my embrace. We exchanged a ghost of a smile and watched the rest of the game in silence, her head resting against my shoulder. Something shifted in me, and an urge to protect this woman, no matter what, grew inside me.

* * *