Page 83 of Letters From A Stalker

“So, how was Hot Doctor?”

I nearly smile. Some traditions apparently survive everything.

“Can we please retire that name?”

She shakes her head adamantly. “No, because you continue refusing to provide anything better.”

“He has a perfectly functional actual name.”

“Dr. Blackwood sounds like somebody who seduces widows in a gothic novel.”

I blink at her.

Tessa’s eyes widened slightly. “Actually, that somehow made him hotter. We’re keeping Hot Doctor.”

I pull the blanket higher over my legs and take another bite of pizza. “Therapy was good.”

Her expression shifts almost immediately. The joking doesn’t disappear entirely, but it moves aside.

“Good as in genuinely good, or good as in you’re saying good because you don’t want me to ask another question?”

“Genuinely.” She waits.

I’m aware of the decision before I make it. Kai’s assignment. What do I want before I begin calculating what Tessa might need from the answer? For once, the answer arrives clearly. I want to tell her.

“We talked about what happened when I was eighteen.”

Tessa puts her glass down. Not dramatically. She doesn’t lunge toward me or cover her mouth as though I have revealed something she doesn’t already know. She knows the whole story, including pieces I have never told anyone else.

“Okay,” she says carefully. “How did that come up?”

“We were talking about boundaries. About saying no.”

Understanding settles across her face. “Oh.”

“Yeah.” I rest the pizza plate on my knees and trace one finger along the edge. “I told him no is probably the most important boundary word for me and also the one I spent a long time feeling didn’t mean anything.”

Tessa’s mouth tightens. “That makes sense.”

“He asked why.”

“And you told him?”

“Pretty much all of it.”

She studies me for several seconds. “How did that feel?”

“Surprisingly okay.” I look down at the plate before correcting myself. “Not comfortable. Obviously. But it wasn’t like talking about Mom. I didn’t disappear on him or anything.”

“You’ve done a lot of work around that already.”

“I know.” The answer comes easily because that is exactly what has been circling my mind all day. “I actually thought I was completely done with it.”

Tessa tilts her head. “Thought?”

I take a slow breath. “There was still this tiny part of me that wondered if I could have done more.”

Her expression changes immediately. “Jules.”