Page 22 of Letters From A Stalker

“You’re using that word again.”

“It’s versatile.”

“It’s becoming meaningless.”

“That seems unfair to the word.”

“I’m sure it’ll recover.”

The corner of her mouth lifts, and the tension inside me eases with it, which is its own fucking problem. I glance at the clock and dislike how much of the hour has already passed.

“I want to ask about the ten years of estrangement from your father. Your intake says he stopped speaking to you after you refused to cut contact with your mother.”

She releases a quiet breath, perhaps relieved that I’m not asking her to repeat information without acknowledging that I already know it.

“That’s the simplified version.”

“What’s missing?”

“He said he couldn’t have a relationship with me while I continued defending someone who had ruined his life.”

“Did you believe she had?”

“No.” The answer is immediate.

“Why not?”

“Because he’d been cheating on her for as long as I can remember.”

Something enters her voice that doesn’t belong to the betrayal itself or the fact that the betrayal didn’t originate from her. It’s shame.

“How young were you when you first became aware of the other women?”

“I didn’t understand what they were. I just knew they existed.”

“Do you remember the first time?”

She hesitates before answering. “There was a woman at a skating rink.”

“How old were you?”

“Five or six.”

Her fingers tighten beneath the sweater cuff.

“He took me skating with someone from work. I thought she was nice. She held my hand when I fell and bought me hot chocolate afterward.” Julia swallows. “When I got home, I told my mother about her.”

“What happened?”

“My father became angry. My mother started crying, and they argued.”

“Did the argument stay between them?”

Her eyes settle somewhere beside my shoulder. “No.”

“What did they say to you?”

“My mother asked why I hadn’t told her sooner. My father said I was making things up because I wanted attention.” She says it quietly, but the words land hard enough to sharpen the anger already sitting beneath my ribs.