Page 46 of Seein’ Red

“See!”

“My point being, that if you can climb between my legs to help clean that off me, the three of us standing here to watch you pee will still not take the top spot of most embarrassing things we’ve done together.”

Sylvie makes a good point. She, Kenzie, and I have been friends since we were babies. The three of us figured out a lot about our bodies and how things work by each other’s side. Let’s add one more thing to that list.

“Here goes,” I mutter, ripping open the foil.

I yank down my leggings, parking myself on the toilet and doing what I need to do. I’m done in under a minute, my heart racing, my mind still a jumble of thoughts and emotions.

Because if we see two pink lines, I think I might come undone.

“What’s it say?” Sylvie asks as I awkwardly redress myself one-handed while trying to keep the test steady and level.

“It’s thinking. Nothing has appeared yet.”

We all huddle around the test, a palpable silence filling the stall as the strip absorbs my urine, waiting for something to appear. What must be less than a minute feels like forever as the control line appears. And another faint line…I think.

I squint, unable to tell if that’s a second line or not. It’s really light, so it might be nothing more than my eyes playing tricks on me. Or maybe that’s just how these work.

“There’s only one line, right?” I ask, hoping one of my friends will give me the confirmation I want.

“The directions said it could take up to three minutes,” Sylvie offers. “Has it been three minutes?”

“I don’t know! Did we set a timer?”

Bronwyn looks at her phone, biting her bottom lip, clearly deep in thought. “When does the three minutes start? Noel sent me a text about the time you stopped and that was two minutes ago, but it’s three minutes from when the urine hits the stick…”

“Why is this so hard?” I grumble.

“Oh, oh, is that…?” Kenzie pipes up.

I squint again, but don’t think anything has changed. There is something there, but it’s so faint I can’t tell if it counts as a line or not.

“Is that one line or two?” I ask, still not sure I want the answer. I need it. I need to know if I am or not. But I also know that if that is two lines, everything will change.

“I have no idea,” Bronwyn offers.

“Why didn’t you buy the digital?” Kenzie asks.

“They were out! I literally bought the only damn test on the shelf!”

Because that’s my luck. There would be a run on pregnancy tests the day that I need one. Which is not helping anything.

My chest tightens, my stomach starting to churn as the little stall starts to feel even smaller. All I want is an answer. Even if it’s not the preferred answer. It’s better than limbo.

“Oh, Will,” Kenzie sighs, pulling me in for a hug. “It’s gonna be okay. It will, promise.”

I want to believe her, but right now it doesn’t feel like it. To make matters worse, I’m ruining her wedding week.

“This week is supposed to be about you, and here I am stealing your thunder,” I say, my words muffled into her shoulder.

Kenzie chuckles. “You are not stealing my thunder. This is what friends do. And honestly, it’s a nice little break from all the wedding crazy.”

I pull back, my cheeks wet from tears I didn’t realize I was crying, and stare at my best friend. “My thinking I’m pregnant with Nash’s baby is a nice break?”

“Well, okay…maybe it’s not where I thought the week was going. But, it’s not often I get to tell Dustin that I had the more exciting week.”

I freeze. Dustin. Kenzie is going to tell Dustin. Which means Sylvie will tell Camden, and Bronwyn will tell Noel. The whole group will know.