Page 44 of Seein’ Red

“Willa!” Bronwyn scolds.

“Sorry, just getting myself back in check.” I try to laugh it off, wiping the tears from my face. I sit up straight, squaring myself off, readying myself. “Pretty simple actually. For all his faults, he’s a good fuck.”

“Still, that’s a lot of years to be sneaking around,” Sylvie comments.

“I didn’t mean for it to go on this long,” I defend. “Really, I didn’t mean for it to start at all. I was still so hurt. We found a footing again, but it was never the same, because no matter what, all I could think of was him and Kitty together. Even when he and Noel were playing pack mule for all my pageant stuff. He caught me off guard that day at the Miss Georgia pageant. And part of me wonders if he really did give me the glow I needed to win. We hooked up again that night—sheer weakness on my part—but also because I was so excited about winning, and I wanted to share that with the best friend I had lost. That time led to another, which led to another. Each time I would become more annoyed with both him and myself. And then from there, it spiraled out of control. The man is a drug.”

“I think that’s something the Kellers pride themselves on,” Bronwyn says. “Noel is the same way.”

We all laugh, the moment of levity much needed.

“How far along are you? Or think you are?” Kenzie asks, pulling me back to the reason this all started.

“Not sure. I’m about a week late. Which, for me, is fucking late. I’m like clockwork. And there are no signs that she plans on showing. And before you ask, yes, we’re careful. Always very, very careful.”

“Have you taken a test?”

“No. I can’t exactly buy one in Hickory Hills—it’d be around town in thirty seconds flat. If we thought Chip cheating on KatieRae or Dustin’s return traveled fast, my buying a pee stick would break the land speed record. And I haven’t had a chance to make it to a place where I can.”

“Then what are we doing here? Let’s go,” Kenzie says, pushing up from the table.

“Where?”

“There’s a Walmart right down the road. Let’s go get you a test.”

“Seriously?”

“We don’t have to be at the caterer’s for another hour and a half. That’s more than enough time for you to pee on a stick.”

I laugh, shaking my head. “What, and you’re just going to stand there and watch?”

“Consider it payback for calling me an idiot and causing me to sit in my pineapple split.”

“And for two decades of teasing me about Camden,” Sylvie adds.

“I was right about both of those!”

I turn to look at Bronwyn, waiting for her to add on. She doesn’t disappoint.

“And disappearing at the Gobble Wobble.”

“Yeah, that one I deserve.”

“You deserve all of them,” Kenzie says. “But more than that, you deserve to be surrounded by those that care the most as you figure this out.”

“Thank you,” I whisper. She smiles back, reassuring me that we have this handled. “Then I guess that’s that. We’re off to see the wizard.”

13

WILLA

Four women. One handicapped bathroom stall.

Exactly how I saw my life going.

The stall is big enough to accommodate the four of us, without us being squished, which is a small, unforeseen perk. It does nothing to negate the awkwardness of the whole situation though. Or relieve any of the fears and anxiety I’m feeling.

I’m not ready for this step.