Page 8 of Home Ice

“The same thing I always do. For my boy to be happy.”

“I’m happy.”

“Un-huh. So you gonna tell me why you were really sitting out here this morning?”

My original instinct is no, especially since it counteracts my point, but if I don’t get this out, it’s going to keep eating at me.

“Jensen Hawke is back in town. I ran into him at the cafe.”

Understanding fills Dad’s light blue eyes. “Huh.”

“Yeah.”

“What did he say?”

Remembering Hawke’s reaction is almost funny to me now. “Pretended he didn’t know who I was.”

“That asshole.”

“Eh … I did it to him first.”

It’s a dicey topic because I know Dad feels guilt over me walking away from my dream, and I feel guilt over how bitter I was initially.

“Shoulda told him,” Dad mutters, yanking at another weed.

“I know.” The thing is, if I’d told Hawke about Dad back then, he would have felt bad. He’d be starting his new life and always feeling like he had to check in, and as unfair as it was to him at the time, I was dealing with enough. I didn’t need the constant reminders of him existing and thriving in a way we were both supposed to when all my energy was going into being okay with how things turned out.

Then I’d held it against him when he stopped trying.

Emotions are the fucking worst.

“Next time you see him,” Dad says, “give him a kick for me.”

I chuckle, imagining Hawke’s reaction to that. “You know what, maybe I will.”

“Think you’d still be friends? If you went off and played hockey together?”

It’s a question I’ve considered a lot. “The likelihood of us staying close was always small.”

He hums. “I bet you would have.”

Before the conversation can get depressing, I lean down and plant a kiss on the top of his Boston hat. “No regrets from me. What-ifs aren’t helpful, remember?”

“True.”

“Now, let’s finish so we can set up for lunch.”

I get a step away when Dad speaks again. “You don’t think …”

“What?”

“Remember that kid you told me about?”

It takes me a second to follow. “The one on my team?”

“Who looks like Jensen.”

I’m curious about where he’s going with this. “Yeah …”