Page 67 of Open To Negotiation

“Do you mind if I borrow a shirt?” I didn’t look at him, my voice low. I felt dirty and I probably smelt like booze.

“Take your time,” he replied softly. I nodded without looking at him and hurried out of the room and up the stairs.

I pulled my skirt off angrily and stomped to his bathroom. I threw the outfit in the garbage and closed the door. I would never be able to wear it again, it would be a reminder of the shame I was feeling about bailing him out again. I could never see it and not think about how my father ruined a perfectly good night.

Gripping the counter, I hung my head and took a few breaths before I looked up. My eyes were watery, the tears I had been hiding were finally coming.

Wiping the few that had fallen, I went to Theo’s closet, grabbing one of his T-shirts. His scent enveloping me, it had a calming effect. The length of the shirt meant that I could get away without trying to find pants, a reminder of how much bigger than me he was.

I opened a drawer and found a hoodie as well. It was soft and light blue. It had University of Cambridge written on it and the school’s crest. I knew that all the guys had gone to school together there. It looked like he wore it often, even though I’d never seen him in something so casual. I pulled it on, trying to stop some of the shivering taking over my body.

I wasn’t shivering from the cold, it was from the anger, anxiety, and adrenaline leaving my body. I knew the effects all too well and would soon crash. I grabbed a pair of his socks and left the room to go face him. I was surprised to see only the light over the stove left on, the rest of the house dark, the lightning streaking the sky.

The glass doors leading to the deck were open and Theo sat in one of the chairs. I took a step outside quietly. He’d taken off his jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his white shirt to reveal his muscular, tattooed forearms. But I didn’t let myself get distracted by them.

Without a word, I took the seat beside him, the covering over the patio saving us from getting wet. I pulled my knees up to my chest and rested my chin on top of them, curling myself into a protective ball.

When he still didn’t say anything I turned my head to look at him. He was staring off into the storm with a tight jaw. After another crack of thunder he broke the silence.

“You better start talking, Love, because I’m pretty certain what just happened isn’t the first time and I’m trying to convince myself not to drive back to his house and ram my fist into his face for treating his daughter like that.” There was a menacing growl in his words.

“It started when I was seventeen.” I’d already decided that I was going to give him whatever information he asked for tonight, I resigned myself to the fact that this might be too much. I looked back to the storm, the story would be easier to tell if I didn’t try and gauge his reactions. “He knew I’d been working, knew I’d started a college fund. I was so excited about the hard work I was doing that I had made the mistake of telling him.

“It was the first time so when he asked, he sounded awful and remorseful and scared. Now I know it was manipulation. But I got in my car, bailed him out and dropped him home. He promised it was a one-time thing, that he had made a mistake. He lied, obviously.”

“How often?”

I scrabbed a hand down my face but the tears fell anyway. I didn’t talk about this, it was something I was ashamed of. Not just of him, but of the choice I made every time he called. Aubrey didn’t even know how often I had bailed him out over the years. We fought about it in university and I hadn’t talked about it again. It only came up if I was with her when he called.

“He’s unpredictable. After a bigger loss like tonight, it should be at least another few months before he needs me to bail him out again. When the amounts are smaller, the nights happen more frequently.

“I honestly don’t know how often or how much I’ve given him. At the start I tried to keep track but when I realized he’d never pay me back, I stopped. He wins once in a while I’m sure, but I don’t see a cent of that money.” I finally looked over at Theo to see his jaw clenched and the hand resting on the armrest of his chair had moved to grab the edge, tightening.

“Does your mom know?”

I let out a breath as more lightning streaked through the sky. “No, she doesn’t know about any of it.” I wiped a tear and pulled the sleeves of Theo’s sweater over my hands. Now that I was talking I wasn’t sure I could stop, the story tumbling out of me. “I’ve hid it from her because what my dad did broke her. She loved him and he constantly let her down. I couldn’t let her know that he was still doing it because she always said that even though their marriage didn’t work, she was happy he was always a good dad.

“When I was younger, I really wanted to tell her. But now… she’s had this boyfriend for the last two years that she loves and he adores her. They rented a place in Italy near some vineyards and are planning on staying there for about six months, maybe more.” I looked over at him to find him watching me closely, his blue-grey eyes burning into me. “She’s happy now. I’m not burdening her with this.”

“You shouldn’t—”

“I know I shouldn’t be paying to fix his problems but if I don’t, who’s going to?”

His eyebrows went up at my raised voice. “If you hadn’t interrupted me, I would have said that you shouldn’t have to be burdened with this either.” Despite the situation I smiled a little at him.

“Oh, whoops.” I bit my lip and looked back at him. “I want you to know he never has to know about you or who you are. I will make sure he never asks for money from you. I also never want you to give him any.”

He frowned. “You think I’m bothered by this bullshit because you’re worried about him knowing that I have money?”

I frowned back at the annoyance in his voice. “Well… yes. I know what Asher said, there have been comments made that you have all been used for your money before and I don’t want you to think that would ever be—”

“Love,” he interrupted me again. “I know you wouldn’t ask me for money. I know you better than that. I just wish you would stop helping him.” I dropped my shoulders, letting out a breath.

“How am I supposed to do that?” He reached out and grabbed my hand.

“I don’t know, Quinn, but we’ll figure it out.” I was surprised he wasn’t forcing me to stop or forcing a fix on me. I appreciated that he wasn’t going to dictate a solution to me, it was a surprising personality trait for him considering how he had to act in business. I also loved that he used ‘we.’ I nodded and some of the tension left my shoulders. “I like you in my clothes, Love.”

He pulled my hand forcefully, yanking me up from my chair, not that I put up a fight. Once I was settled sideways in his lap, his arms circled around me, my head resting on his chest as we listened to the rain pouring around us as the storm rolled through and a calm settled over me.