Page 241 of Keldori By Daybreak

“I hope so.”

Changing was easy, I decided, when there was someone there to be the rock. The difference between me and Mom now was that I still had mine.

We arrived at the memorial reception as it was in full swing. Siobhan’s freezer was still broken thanks to Fana, but the local pizza shop and bakery had both brought plenty of food for everyone.

It was exactly how Gams would’ve wanted it. All her closest friends and family shared food and laughed. The drinks flowed as easily as the tears, and jubilant, grieving voices joined together in music. It was the perfect reception and the perfect homecoming.

Sorcha pulled Mom into Gams’s usual group of giggling old women within moments of our arrival, but I lingered by the door. I’d never been one for parties.

Someone joined me at my side, but I didn’t have to look to see who it was. His presence had become as familiar as my own, and his thoughts swirled against mine.

He knew better than to ask if I was okay. Instead, he stood silently and waited.

“I would like to go somewhere quiet,” I whispered.

Ciarán took my hand and led me out of the tavern and down the empty street. When he stopped in front of Gams’s shop, I shook my head.

“It reminds me too much of her.” The words felt cruel as I said them. Why would I not want to be reminded of Gams?

Ciarán nodded, however, and we continued to the bagel shop instead.

I froze at the top of the apartment staircase, staring at the forty or so porcelain chickens set out on the kitchen counter.

“My aunt and uncle’s,” Ciarán explained when he followed my gaze.

“And have you—”

“No.” He pulled a glass from a cupboard. “You should drink some water. I’ll see if there’s anything to eat.”

“Is it because of me?” I asked.

Ciarán set the empty glass on the counter and looked out the window to avoid looking at me.

“It’s my own issue to figure out,” he said. “I’ll take care of it when I’m ready.”

“You’re still jealous of Liam.”

He shrugged, but his smile was sad when he leaned against the kitchen counter to look at me. He’d found a black button-up in Liam’s closet for the memorial, and it reminded me of his Grimguard armor in a strange way.

He was handsome, with his hair pulled up neatly and the freshly pressed shirt. I hated that Liam still haunted him in a way that made him feel less-than.

“For what it’s worth, I never kissed Liam.” I folded my arms at him, daring him to challenge me.

His smile turned sly. “Only because you never had the chance.”

“Guess we’ll never know.”

I’d missed him lately. We alternated sleep schedules, each of us watching over the other’s dreams to keep out the nightmares. In those hours where we were both awake, there wasn’t much to say and we’d taken to giving each other privacy to grieve.

“Tell me about Liam,” he said.

“Sorry?” I laughed, certain I’d misheard him.

“I told you to tell me about Liam once and you refused. I want you to tell me about him now, and then I’ll decide if I want to remember.”

I sighed and shrugged. “He was nice.”

“That’s not going to cut it.” Ciarán’s face had turned stony, and I realized he was serious.