Page 68 of Everlasting Vows

Callie

I will

Good night

Another text follows quickly.

Callie

I’m so happy for you

Abbi

Thank you

Me too

22

ABBI

I catch glimpses of Nix working outside, finishing the last section of stone walkway from the house to the fire pit. Scanning the area, I note the amount of work he’s undertaken to make the space beautiful for Prue’s wedding. The work he’s done is impressive, and now that Theo’s finished the carpentry work, the garden is coming together nicely. Rose just needs to deliver the plants we ordered, and we can get them in the ground, and the yard will be finished.

I drop my eyes back to Nix, appreciating the way his muscles move and flex beneath his T-shirt. Apart from his physical strength, he’s so capable. It’s one of the things that always drew me to him, even when we were teenagers; he always seemed more capable than the other boys our age. More able to control and command a situation. He can take on any task with confidence and see it through to completion with an ease most people could only hope to achieve.

Other than during our date last week, he’s been more introspective than usual since the holdup at Mr. and Mrs. B’s store, and I think it has everything to do with our discussion that night, rather than the event itself. As much as it broke me to see him in so much pain, I appreciated his openness to share his fears with me, something he hadn’t done before.

He’s trying.

For me.

For us.

But I don’t know where we go from here. As much as I love him, if we can’t share a bed, what’s the point. We may as well be good friends and roommates, not husband and wife. He’s kept his promise to be more present, but I want to sleep beside my husband. I want the intimacy that’s growing between us during daylight hours to transfer to nighttime. It’s been almost six years since the night that shook the foundation of our marriage; surely enough time has passed.

I lean against the kitchen window so I can watch Nix work. I raise the glass I’m holding to my lips for a sip as I watch his jeans pull tight across his ass and thighs. He really is an attractive man. I sigh wistfully, my breath ghosting across my lips like a wish.

He digs into his pocket and drags out his phone, his eyes squinting down at the screen as if he can’t make sense of what he sees. I admire his bulging bicep beneath his T-shirt when he raises his hand to scrub across the top of his short hair as he accepts the call and holds the phone to his ear. Then I watch as all the color drains from his face, leaving his skin ashen. He drops to his butt on the stone he just laid as if he’s unable to hold himself up a moment longer, and my stomach curdles like sour milk. Dropping, swooping to my feet and leaving my body.

I know that action. It’s what he does when he’s upset … distressed.

Something’s wrong.

Murphy.

Without hearing his conversation, I know something is terribly wrong and press my hand to my stomach to keep the contents in place without thought. Raising his head slowly, his eyes meet mine through the glass, and the devastation in his gaze turns my muscles to liquid. I can’t tear my eyes away as his fill with apology and despair.

The glass slips from my hand, smashing loudly on the hardwood floor and shattering into a dozen pieces. Cool water splashes on my feet like pinpricks, and between one moment and the next, I collapse with a heavy thud, my world tilting on its axis. Broken glass digs into my hand, and I watch with distant fascination as blood beads on my pale skin, growing, pooling, and sliding toward the floor as gravity wins the battle.

Murphy.

The back door opens and slams shut like a gunshot, jolting me, and then I’m being jostled. Scooped up from the floor and pressed against Nix’s firm chest. I turn my head slowly to bury my face in the warmth of his neck, breathing in his familiar scent, centering myself.

“Abbi,” he mutters, his breath dusting my cheek. “Abs.” His voice is pained, distraught, reaching down to the depths of my awareness. “I need to grab the first-aid kit.”

A chair scrapes against the floor, and Nix leans forward to place me on it, but I refuse to let go of him, tightening my arms around his neck, making it impossible for him to release me.

Murphy.