Page 33 of Break Me: Smith and Belle

“No, they didn’t.”

“Then how do you know Miranda Thorne was in an insane asylum?”

“Seth told me,” he confessed. “He was the reason the Thorns had been fighting. Mr. Thorne had found out that Miranda had been seeing Seth. He caught them in the stables, actually.”

I looked up at the whitewashed stable, an acid taste in my mouth. I couldn’t imagine a future in which Belle would after cheat on me nor I on her. But I could imagine how infidelity could shake the core of a marriage. My first wife had been unfaithful to me a number of times. I’d done the same to her. I knew what it was like to love someone and then slowly lose all connection with them.

“She came to Seth and told him she was with child,” Rowan told me. “His child. She was raving. Said she wasn’t safe. The police were searching for her by then—searching for any Thorne they could find. He tried to hide her away at first, but then… Well, it became obvious to him that she needed more help than he could give her. He found a place in Brighton that would take her. That’s how she wound up institutionalized.”

“What happened to the baby?”

“What happens to babies born to institutionalized mothers? It was a long time ago,” Rowan said. “Things weren’t the same back then. I’m sure the baby found a home somewhere.”

“And Miranda? She’s still there?”

“As far as I know, she never left,” he said sadly.

I understood now why Rowan hadn’t been more forthcoming about his past with Thornham. His brother Seth had been intimately involved with the Thorne family. I also knew what it was like to want to leave the past behind only to have it rear its ugly head over and over. I thanked him and made my way back toward the house. I didn’t believe in ghosts, but I did believe that the past could come back to haunt you. The question was: whose past was haunting us now?

I sat in my study, staring out the window at the large oaks that towered behind the main house. Their branches reached out as if to offer me comfort, or, perhaps, refuge from Thornham itself. I had found the asylum in Brighton where Miranda Thorne must have been placed, using my mobile. I didn’t know what I would do with that information. What answers could I hope to find by seeking out a woman who’d been considered insane for decades? The more I learned about our house, the more I wondered if the country was the safe haven I’d hoped it would be.

The house was eerily silent. I sent Mrs. Winters off for the evening, determined to wait for Belle and the others for dinner. Penny had been napping happily in the nursery under Nora’s watchful eye through the afternoon. Georgia had texted when they left London, telling me they’d be home soon. It was time to tell Belle what I’d uncovered. Miranda Thorne may have been locked away, unable to hurt anyone else, but there was another Thorne in the world—one almost nobody knew about. I didn’t know whether to see that as conspiracy or coincidence, my own life too scrambled by the past for me to say either way. I leaned back in my chair, rolling my neck along its edge in a futile attempt to work out the perpetual tension locked there.

The soft footfall of approaching steps caught my attention. I stared out the window, watching the stars that punctuated the sky so brilliantly in the country. I promised to give her those, but what would it cost us?

“I don’t know what to do,” I confessed and I heard her stop. It would be easier like this. I had not wanted to keep what was going on from her. I didn’t want to keep anything from my wife, but her fragile mental state seemed to dictate it necessary. Now that I had answers, it was time to come clean. “I swore I would protect Penny, but I can’t help thinking that I’m failing her. Maybe coming here was a bad idea. There are things you should know. But I don’t know where to begin.”

I closed my eyes, pinching the bridge of my nose with my thumb and index finger, feeling another headache coming on. She came behind the chair, her delicate hands reaching to knead my shoulders. “Do you think anyone ever escapes their past? I can’t help feeling like my sins have come to collect.”

I reached up, closing my hand over hers to draw her down, needing her skin on mine, craving the taste of her kiss.

“Is that a new perfume?” I asked, bringing her wrists to my lips and breathing in the scent of her. “I like it.”

I opened my eyes, starting to turn and take her in my arms when my gaze caught a reflection in the window. I dropped the hand of my mouth, spinning the chair around before jumping to my feet and taking a step back. Nora froze on the spot, her dark eyes round orbs against her pale skin.

“It’s okay,” she finally murmured, edging a bit closer. “You aren’t failing anyone, Smith. Penny couldn’t have a better father.”

“You should leave,” I growled in a low voice. Her perfume lingered in my nostrils, turning my stomach.

“I see you.” She shook her head, refusing to budge. “Belle might not see how hard you’re fighting—”

“Do not say her name.” It was all I could do to keep my fury under control. Georgia had warned me and I hadn’t listened.

“Smith,” she said softly, daring to move closer to me and reaching to place palm on my chest. “I can be —”

I shoved her hand away. “You need to leave.”

“If you would only—”

“Pack. Your. Bags!” I exploded.

She advanced again and grabbed a fistful of my sweater. “You’ve felt it, too! I’ve seen the way you look at me when she isn’t watching.”

“What the fuck is going on here?” Belle’s voice sliced through the air.

Nora startled away from me, cringing into the shadows.

“Beautiful,” I called, but she had already fled. I turned on Nora, taking one menacing step in her direction. “Clear your room. I want you gone in the morning.”