Page 69 of Blacklist

“Sorry, Lucky,” Sterling says. “I thought you could use a little excitement in your life.”

“Is that so?” I tread water, glaring at him.

“Okay, maybe not excitement,” he hedges, “but some fun?” He no longer sounds so sure about this theory.

“I’ll give you fun.” I dive toward him, throwing myself against his body. We crash under the water in a tangle of arms and legs and possibilities.

* * *

An hour later, after Sterling’s clothes finish drying, the three of them head back to campus in an Uber. I sneak into the kitchen through the back door. My father and brother don’t come down here, so it’s the safest option. But the heavenly scent of bourbon chocolate chip cookies, Felix’s specialty, greets me on entry. He pauses at the oven with an eyebrow raised.

“Long night?” he asks, scanning me up and down. I’d foregone the dryer in favor of a large, fluffy towel. He looks at the puddle dripping onto his clean floor and sighs. “I’m not going to ask.”

“I went for a swim.” It’s not exactly a lie.

“Get changed and come down for a cookie.”

I dash upstairs and toss on some yoga pants and a clean T-shirt. Then I head back down for cookies and advice. Felix is always good for both.

He’s pulling the first batch out of the oven when I arrive. I reach for one hot off the cookie sheet, and he smacks my hand away.

“I thought you might need these when you didn’t come in last night,” he says.

“Did anyone else notice I was gone?” I ask.

“They haven’t said anything to me.” He winks.

I swipe a hot cookie off the rack and bite into it. Chocolate and vanilla move across my tongue, but it’s the slight hit of whiskey that warms me up. I groan. “I did need this. You’re psychic.”

“Equally good for heartbreak and hangovers,” he says to me. “What am I dealing with?”

“The latter,” I admit. Felix doesn’t need to know the particulars. I’d rather he think I was out having a good time, having a little too much to drink, then worrying that I was in danger.

“It sounds like your friends and you were having a blast this morning,” he says.

“Sorry,” I say with a frown. “Were we too loud?”

“It’s nice to hear laughter in this house again,” he says, adding quietly, “Of course, I’m not used to boys spending the night.”

“Nothing happened!” Normally, I would have snuck Sterling and Kai off the premises before dawn. It’s not like a guy’s never spent the night in the pool house before. Plenty of my male friends have crashed there over the years. I’d always just been too afraid of what would happen if daddy spotted them to let them stay past dawn. He’s too preoccupied to notice something like that now, but Felix isn’t.

“No judgment.” That’s his way of saying that he’s cool. Felix is cool. But he’s more like my granddad than he wants to admit. I know he doesn’t want to think about me having sex with anyone—not that he has to worry about that.

“I didn’t recognize those boys,” he says.

“They’re just friends,” I say, taking another cookie.

“Are you sure about that?” he asks. “I couldn’t help taking a peek outside.”

“Well, Kai is gay, so I wouldn’t get my hopes up there,” I warn him in a teasing voice.

“And the other one?”

“Not gay.”

“So?”

“I’m not sure,” I admit. Felix is the only safe party to have this discussion with. If Poppy knows that I have even the slightest curiosity about Sterling, she’ll never stop playing the matchmaker. Until I make up my mind about what I think about him, I can’t have that. “He’s complicated.”