Page 54 of Blacklist

“Maybe you should tell him that.”

I shake my head. ”Why should I have to tell him anything?”

“Because he obviously doesn’t get it. It’s the fatal flaw of men: obliviousness.”

“He doesn’t seem very oblivious to me.” I flashback to Sterling advancing toward me in the hall. My body had synced to his in that moment, moving in tune with him. I’d retreated because I knew he would chase me.

The pantry door cracks open and Cyrus pops his head in. “What are you two doing in here? Everyone is looking for you.”

My stomach flips, even though I know he means Poppy. As confident as I feel I can’t deny that each passing second is filing away at my already frayed nerves.

“We were just having a chat,” Poppy says cheerily, as though we don’t have a care in the world, and whispering in pantries is perfectly normal behavior for grown women.

“Are you two ready to rejoin civilization then?” he asks.

I open my mouth to say yes, but Poppy picks this moment to tattle on me. “Adair is dreading Sterling’s presence.”

“Traitor,” I mutter.

“It’s completely obvious,” she says defensively. “Plus, Cyrus needs to look out for you when I’m needed. Right, darling?”

“Of course—” Cyrus wraps an arm around her waist, “—when I can take my eyes off you.”

“Do you two need a moment alone in the pantry?” The last thing I need is to be party to their particular brand of affection. It’s so sugary, I feel like I should stir it into some tea.

“Sorry.” He doesn’t look the least bit like he means it. Cyrus always has something to prove when it comes to his feelings for Poppy. Tonight is no different. “Honestly, Adair, we’re all adults now. I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about.”

Poppy clears her throat and he changes course. “Naturally, I’ll step in if necessary.”

“Thanks.” I swallow back a sigh. I’m so tired of my friends trying to protect me. “But I can take care of myself.”

“Still…” Cyrus leaves the offer hanging. He kisses Poppy. “I’ll see you out there.”

“Why does everyone always assume I need help?” I grumble as soon as he’s gone.

Poppy grabs my shoulders. “It doesn’t matter if you need our help. Our friendship isn’t merit-based. We’re going to help because we’re your friends. End of story.”

“When did you get so bossy?” I ask.

“When you decided to get whiny,” she tells me. “You’re stronger than this. You always have been. Sterling coming back was unexpected. I don’t blame you for being shaken, but now it’s time to dust yourself off and remember who you are.”

“But,” I begin.

“If ifs and buts were candy and nuts, we’d all have a Merry Christmas,” she stops me.

I can’t help laughing at this. “What does that mean?”

“You can’t live your life wondering about the future or the past. There are no buts about it. You are Adair MacLaine, and whatever mistakes you’ve made, Sterling made the bigger one when he lost you.”

“Seriously, what did you do with my best friend?” It’s like she’s a different person since she came back from Paris.

“I can’t help it,” she confesses. “I don’t like seeing you like this.”

“I just don’t understand why he came back,” I say softly.

“Yes, you do. He came back because he’s still in love with you.”

“That doesn’t explain why he’s trying to ruin my family,” I say.