Page 64 of Dickathlon

“Jeez, Dec, what’d you expect? Seven of us lived here for our entire childhoods. I only moved out a few years ago.”

He stuttered, having trouble finding words.

“Did you think we lived in a shack?”

“I guess I hadn’t thought a lot about it until now. It’s a beautiful house.”

“Smooth recovery. All your studying and I can’t believe you didn’t look at the street view.” We grabbed our bags out of the back seat and headed toward the front porch.

“Uncle Ty!”

I didn’t make it. All four of my nieces and nephews swarmed me, and then they noticed Declan. God damn if his bicep wasn’t bulging as he held his bag over his shoulder.

“Is that your boy wife?” Casey asked, pointing to Declan. “No, that’s not right. Um, but he’s yours, right?”

I watched Declan’s eyes go wide before I answered. “He’s mine, little dude. His name’s Declan and he’s my boyfriend.”

“Declan!” James and Kora ran over to him and grabbed his legs. Luckily, he was strong enough to walk with them holding on, each one sitting on a foot.

“Boyfriend! That’s the word. Dad told me, but I forgot.”

I ruffled his hair, and felt tiny fingers interlock with mine. I looked down to see little Riley, looking up at me and smiling.

“Mommy says your boyfriend’s hot.”

“Oh, does she now? That’s nice, Riley. Let’s go find your mommy and embarrass her, shall we?”

Casey ran ahead of us, announcing our arrival, as if they hadn’t all heard their kids scream and run out the front door already.

I assumed they were all waiting in the kitchen instead of swarming us like children outside. Not my mother’s usual greeting, but I guess I didn’t bring a boyfriend home every day. She was at the door waiting.

“I thought you had enough of a circus without little ‘ole me out there too.”

“You could never add to the circus mom. You’re too pretty to be a clown.”

I turned to see Declan making it up the porch stairs, kids in tow.

“Don’t make me get the broom, you two. Leave poor Declan alone!”

James and Kora scattered and followed Casey inside.

“See you later, Uncle Ty. Mommy said she’d need some tissues for her drool.”

My mom watched Riley scamper after the others.

I rescued my mom from her confusion. “I think Rene’s been chatting about Declan to somebody and little Riley was listening. Speaking of Declan, Mom, this is Declan. Declan, my mom.”

“Call me Victoria, please.” Declan went to shake her hand, but that’s not my mom. He got a full hug. “I think you’re bigger than Travis!” she said, one hand still resting on his arm.

“I heard that!”

“That was Travis,” I whispered to Declan.

“Well, let’s go, BB. Bring him in here so we can inspect him!”

“That’s Owen.”

“BB?” Declan asked.