Page 52 of The Forever Vault

“I’m not gonna be able to quote him exactly, you realize?”

I nodded. “Of course. I’m just curious.”

“Well, he’s been my coach since high school, so he was there for my gay awakening. I think my parents knew I was gay before I did and that’s why they hired him. He was the first person I came out to, and helped me through coming out to everyone else. I guess I said what I said because when I started to talk about sex stuff with him, he was adamant about me being safe and careful and had a pretty long speech about consent.”

Ezra glanced up at me. He had been fiddling with his fingers in his lap.

“I’m a lot less angry now. If there’s more, you can keep going. I’ll let you know if I want you to stop.”

“That’s the kind of stuff he would say. ‘If you’re with a guy and you’re in the middle of…stuff, and you want to stop, you have every right to stop. You don’t need to keep going just because you got naked.’ He was really protective of me, kind of like a big brother. I kind of did the same thing to my younger sister when she started dating.”

I smiled at that though I couldn’t relate. Colton and Ty had both delved into the dick pool before their brothers even knew they were gay, and I was an only child, who had only been with two guys. One of them had just fucked me; the other was who Ezra was talking about.

“I started looking for safe spaces to explore my sexuality in Seattle and…” Ezra hesitated.

“And what?”

“You have to promise not to tell anyone, Cam. I haven’t really told many people and it’s pretty kinky. If you have to tell Luke, I understand, but I’m not super comfortable just letting everyone know about it.”

“I won’t say a word to anyone, Ezra. I promise.” I brought my hand up to his shoulder for a reassuring squeeze.

Pretty kinky. What is he talking about?

Ezra took a deep breath and continued. “I found a pup community. I don’t have a handler or anything. I guess I should ask if you know anything about it first.” He looked at me expectantly. “Do you?”

I was a little surprised, but had seen some pics with guys wearing hoods and harnesses and even tails…in their butts. It was hot to look at, but I hadn’t felt the need to participate.

“I’m aware of it, but haven’t ever participated.”

“Cool. Okay, so my puppy name is Tadashi. It means loyal in Japanese, but I also liked it because I had a huge crush on Tadashi in Big Hero 6. The other guys call me Tad for short. I haven’t done a lot of stuff, but I’ve been to a few meetups. I don’t have a ton of gear either, but I do have a hood and some other stuff.” Ezra’s cheeks grew red quickly. “I can’t believe I told you.”

“It’s okay, Ezra. I won’t say anything.”

“And you’re totally fine with it? That I like pup play?”

“Everyone has kinks. I’m happy you felt comfortable enough to tell me about one of yours.”

“Does that mean you’ll tell me about one of your kinks?”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “Colton says I’m pretty vanilla, so I’m not sure how exciting it is to hear that Luke and I switch up a lot.”

“Like, you change positions when you fuck?”

“Well, yeah, but I meant that we both top and we both bottom.”

“Oh!” Ezra’s eyes went wide, then his brows furrowed. “I thought you’d always be the top.”

“In your dreams maybe.”

Ezra mock-gasped, then punched me in the shoulder. “You’re probably right. I just don’t have a lot of time to date, and all the pup stuff usually happens late at night. Hard to fit that in when you’re qualifying for the Olympics.”

“I know how that is. I still can’t believe it. It’s surreal being on the team again.”

“I bet. It’s kind of like you had no warning, no time to prepare.”

“I had prepared! I just prepared to watch and support Luke. I had already accepted it was over and done for me. Now, I feel like I’m playing catch up.”

Ezra laughed. “You had, what? Like a week off? You’re an amazing athlete, Cam.” Now, it was his turn to shoulder-squeeze. “You’re going to crush it. Besides Jack Davies, you have the most experience of any all-around gymnast here.”