CHAPTER ONE
No matter how justified, killing family members is still homicide.
Cody kept the reminder on a loop in his mind. He hadn’t been expecting to host a Bower family dinner that year, but he and Demmy seemed to be pulling it off so far..
“Do you have any other chairs?”
Roman had tried to temper his usual attitude, but Cody could hear the sneer in the question.
“You could sit on the sofa in the living room,” Cody said. “And eat at the kids’ table.”
“I hate that I’m sitting at the kids’ table,” Summer said from the other room.
They’d used both leaves to extend the table almost the full width of the dining room, leaving little space for Cody and Demmy to sit at each end. Even with the table fully extended, they were all squished in tight for dinner. And they’d had to borrow two card tables and chairs to set up in the living room for the kids. “Here, take mine,” Demmy said as he got up.
Cody grit his teeth to keep from barking an order at Demmy to sit down. Roman could suffer in the folding chair with the sprung back support.
“No, no.” Roman held up a hand, and, to his credit, tried to smile. “It’s fine.”
“You’re sure?” Demmy had stopped, blocked by Amelia’s chair.
“I’m sure. Let’s just eat.”
And get this over with might as well have been written in the air above Roman’s head like a comic strip speech bubble. Cody checked, double-checked, then triple-checked his temper as he watched Demmy battle his chair back into place. When he’d finally managed to once again squeeze into his seat, he looked down the table at Cody and smiled.
“Are we all settled now?” Cody said, thinking he did a pretty damn good job of keeping the full intensity of the snark he felt out of his tone. “Can we eat?”
“We haven’t said grace,” Brock said from the living room. His voice broke into a squeak on the word ‘grace.’ He was Roman and Madison’s son, just turned fourteen, and his voice was changing. Cody heard Summer, Brock’s older sister, groan.
“What?” Brock said, his tone indignant. Cody leaned to his right, looking past his father’s shoulder and through the doorway into the living room where he was able to see Brock looking back at him. He’d been hit hard by the puberty bat, gaining not only a squeaky voice, but a glistening complexion and a constellation of acne across his forehead. “We always say grace at home.”
Cody gave him a tight smile. It wasn’t Brock’s fault Roman was his father. No need to take anything out on the kid. Cody needed to save all of that up for face to face conversations with his older brother.
“You know what, Brock? You’re right. We should say grace. Do you want to do the honors?”
When he faced the table again, Cody caught a wink and a smile from Demmy. That made him feel more relaxed. A little.
“Okay.” In the living room, Brock clasped his hands and bowed his head over his plate, pausing to gather his thoughts.
Cody clasped his hands as well, but kept his head up. He looked along the table at his family who’d all come back to Parson’s Hollow on short notice. His parents, Greg and Alice, had driven in from Denver, along with Grant, the oldest of the five Bower boys, and his partner MacKenzie, who wore an orange and brown scarf wrapped around her shaved head. They’d convoyed with their parents because they’d brought along their three kids: Conrad, Mac’s son from another man, and the two kids she had with Grant, Brooke and Dexter, all sitting at one of the kids’ tables in the living room. They’d also brought a generous portion of cannabis which they maintained in a greenhouse on the property.
Roman, the next oldest, had groused about paying last minute rates for a flight, but had come with his wife, Madison, and their kids, Summer, and Roman’s miniature look-alike, Brock, who was still thinking about what to say for grace. Cody’s younger brother Dave was there, of course, because he lived in Parson’s Hollow now, as well as Ollie, to whom Dave was now engaged, though Cody didn’t like to dwell too long on that because… gross. Even the youngest Bower boy, Brady, had made the trip, along with his wife, Hilari, and their four-year-old daughter Erin, who had earned a chair at the grown-up’s table due to her age. Amelia and Otis were seated down by Demmy, and Amelia had helped cook the meal as well.
“Thank you, God, for the bountiful meal before us,” Brock began, his voice creaking and crackling through the words. “We are grateful for the opportunity for us all to gather together to share in this meal. Bless all who have come together under this roof and those they love. And please welcome Great-Grandma Felicia into your loving embrace. She will be missed. Amen.”
Tears burned in Cody’s eyes. He swallowed past a hot lump of emotion that seemed to be stuck just behind the hollow of his throat. Using the edge of his napkin, he wiped his eyes and looked into the living room. Brock was watching him.
“Was that okay?” Brock’s voice cracked on the last syllable.
Cody smiled and nodded. “That was perfect. Thank you.”
He grinned, then reached eagerly for the bowl of mashed potatoes in front of him. Cody was about to turn back to his own plate when he caught Summer’s eye. She smiled, and he smiled back. She’d grown into a smart and open-minded young woman, a miraculous feat considering she’d been raised by Roman. She’d received a full-ride scholarship to Sarah Lawrence, and Cody was overjoyed her enrollment at such a liberal enclave of open thinking had to have raised Roman’s hackles.
The clink and clatter of serving utensils at the grown-up’s table lifted his spirits a bit. He sat for a moment and watched the people he loved—yes, he had to admit, even Roman, dammit—as they dished out sides and grabbed slices of ham or cuts of chicken.
He filled his own plate, smiling and making small talk. But it was difficult to follow even the most simple trains of conversation. How long would it take for him to lose the anxious knots and concerns that he hadn’t done enough? How long until his nervous system understood she was gone, that she wasn’t sitting in Parson’s Pines, anxious and frightened without him there.
“Codes?” Grant’s voice brought Cody back to the moment.