Page 83 of The Villains of Winter

He memorized an entire play for her.

He only needed someone else to cut open his palm for a blood oath to never offend again. Only Elliott would satisfy her.

Then, afterward, she would lose her vengeful interest with Elliott. Elliott would be spared. James would be free of her. It was simple.

“That’s not strange.” Elliott listened to all of it. He’d witnessed worse at the hibernal ceremonies of the past. At least no one else was dead. That’s all that mattered. “I’ll help you with it.”

“Thank you, Elliott.”

“I owe you everything, that’s nothing.” Even in the sweltering summer, Elliott’s sartorial attire was still expected to be formal wear. He spoke around the end of his black tie in between his teeth. “I’ve thought about what you said.”

“What was it I said?”

“That you would protect my soul.”

“I meant every word.” Anima tua anima est mea.

“I want to protect your soul. That is the least I can do for one of my favorite people in the world. Semper una.” Elliott felt lighter in his heart than he had in months. “I don’t care anymore if people think my fervor for you is unnatural or strange to them. It only matters that it isn’t unnatural or strange to you to love another man wholeheartedly.”

“Homo sum, humani nihil a me alienum puto[13]. To love is natural, Elliott,” James responded beside him. “‘I’m human; I think nothing human alien to me.’ I think nothing unnatural to me with you.”

Elliott almost mentioned that he was interested in what might happen at the banquets, but he thought better than to tell James that. Instead, he accidentally fumbled his Walkman, and when he leaned over James to retrieve it, their lips brushed.

Elliott had accidentally kissed him. He stammered an apology, expecting James to laugh. Except, he realized his words before the accidental kiss had sounded romantic. Before he knew it, James pressed his mouth against his.

Then James froze, realizing Elliott hadn’t moved.

“Was that a mistake?”

Elliott gazed at the ceiling, where he had pinpricks of stars. He flushed. “Yeah, it was a mistake. I tried to speak of philia–love between friends. It’s something I learned in lecture. I only–I never meant–I tried to pick up the Walkman–sorry about that.”

James understood what he meant. “We can forget it ever happened.”

“Is that what you want?”

James nodded.

“Alright then.” Elliott smiled at him. “If you ever want to kiss me and forget about it afterward, you always can.”

“I want to take my mind off of everything.”

If James could shut his mind down for even a minute, he would. Æscwulf College was quiet and quaint in the summer, he focused on the gentle flora–summersweets, silverberries, water willows, and buttonbushes–anything but the chaos increasing in his mind.

From Aphrodite, erotic madness. Amatory obsession, pursuits of pleasure, sensual rapture. James thought of the tranquil, serene, sensual liberties that Æscwulf College permitted in the summer. Where one was free to pursue all the revelry they desired.

Elliott’s words arose in the drowsy, soft sunlight.

“It doesn’t need to mean anything.” Elliott still thought of him as a friend. Elliott never thought of kissing as strictly romantic. Therefore, he never minded it with anyone.

James guided their mouths back together. He missed the taste of him already. He hadn’t even thought of Elliott in a romantic way before.

Elliott returned his kiss with passion, his fingers slightly quivering.

James smirked against his mouth, teasing him a bit. “I didn’t give you a reason to be shaking. It was one kiss.”

Three.

“I’ve never kissed a man before.” It occurred to Elliott that he might be terrible with men. He nervously trembled with unpracticed hands.