Page 23 of A Tale of Mirth & Magic

“This ain’t a fiddle, lady, it’s a lute. Are ya blind?”

Holding in giggles, Elikki said, “Right you are. Deepest apologies.” The little gnome scowled, her russet-brown face pinched under a mop of stark white hair.

“Oh, chill out, Mavis,” Pink Pantaloons said. “Don’t insult our charming audience!”

“Audience?” I said, slightly alarmed.

“Yes! How fortuitous! We can try out some new material for you!” Pink Pantaloons seemed to speak only in excited exclamations. He and Scarf Girl jumped forward, corralling Elikki and me to sit on a large fallen log at the side of the road.

“Those nincompoops at the inn had no taste,” Scarf Girl said. “We had to… er… move on after just a couple songs. Uncultured twats.”

“But you two look like just the kind of folk who would appreciate ingenious melodies when you hear them! I’m Vin, and this is my sister, Niv! Just rest here a few moments while our world-renowned troupe prepares to WOW you!”

Vin bowed. Niv winked. They were off in a flash, a whirlwind of color shouting excitedly at their companions and pulling instruments from the wagon.

I was about to protest, but Elikki was clearly loving this. Her eyes sparkled with amusement. I sighed. If this was what brushed away the shadows from earlier and brought a smile back to her face, then I could endure an ear-grating song or two. We had to stop for lunch soon anyway.

I tied Pebble loosely to a tree near a small creek. After grabbing a few items from my saddlebags, I settled onto the log beside Elikki. I laid a napkin on the log between us and spooned some preserved fig spread over two slightly stale flatbreads and added walnuts, honey, and cheese on top. I cut a few thin slices of cured meat and added that. Folding them in half, I passed one to Elikki. She raised an eyebrow.

“It’s good. Trust me,” I said. She took a bite. Chewing, her eyes widened.

“Okay, that is amazing. The spicy kick in the meat is genius.” She took a bigger bite, eventually swallowed, then said, “Wow, I’m obsessed with this.”

“One of my sister Monty’s creations. A favorite of mine.” Pleased, I started on my own meal as we watched the performers setting up.

The dwarf and fairy had finally untangled their limbs and climbed down from the driver’s bench. The fairy, a willowy young man with deep black skin, helped Vin unlatch the wagon’s door. They placed the thick piece of wood on the ground to create a small stage of sorts. The fairy stood in the center and cleared his throat, then began running through a series of warm-up vocal exercises.

Niv raced around, scarves flying, positioning the rest of the group in the road. The ruddy-faced dwarf man helped her pull the centaur’s attention away from the clouds and got him next to the fairy.

Mavis the gnome began to do her little hopping dance around the centaur as she tuned her lute. It was hard to tell whether her goal was to keep him in place, entertain him, or bother him. But the muscular centaur laughed good-naturedly, his two golden arms and four oak-colored hairy legs moving in time with Mavis’s wild tune.

Spotting Elikki and me on our log, he waved and let out a “WOOOOOOO! Hotties in the house!”

“That man is as high as a kite.” Elikki giggled, nodding toward the blissed-out centaur.

“Seems to be enjoying himself though,” I said, laughing with her.

We waved back at him, and I did a high, appreciative whistle. Delighted, the centaur flexed his pecs and made an elaborate kicking turn, nearly trampling Mavis. She shook her tiny fist at him and huffed off to the other side of the makeshift stage. The dwarf came over and passed a tambourine up to him. The centaur looped it on one wrist like a bracelet and resumed his flexing.

“He must be their eye candy backup dancer,” she said. “Look at that body!”

“Mm-hmm. Guess it wouldn’t hurt to stay for a song or two. Since he’s so excited we’re here,” I said. Elikki and I grinned at each other.

We ate our meal and watched the troupe prepare. I savored the sweet spiciness of my flatbread sandwich, chewing slowly. It reminded me of home. Elikki went to her pack and brought back two small cloudmelons, perfectly sky blue and ripe, passing one to me with a lingering touch. We enjoyed our dessert in content silence, watching as the flurry of activity gradually slowed into some semblance of order.

Finally, Vin stepped up to the front of the group, clapping his hands loudly once. “Good afternoon, dear friends! My companions and I are ready to display our prodigious musical talents for your enjoyment!”

Elikki cheered. Encouraged, Vin went on, “Let me introduce your fine performers! Niv, my fellow fiddler! Mavis, on the lute! Kramdor, our dwarvish piper! Mulberry, with the most ethereal voice in all the lands! And Gethos, our hunky tambourinist!” The centaur shook his jangly instrument flirtatiously, winking at the audience.

Vin shushed him and shouted, “We are… the Warbling Wanderers!”

“Hang on,” Niv said, “I thought we agreed on the Wandering Weevils.”

“No no—it was the Wistful Wailers,” said Kramdor.

Mavis piped up, “I still like the Winsome Wonders.”

“The Wiggling Waffles!” Elikki threw out before dissolving into giggles again.