Page 75 of The Secret to Belonging

intentionally limited time together

every choice grounded in fear

it’s hard to celebrate

when you’re a hostage of dysfunction

but

you don’t want to be held prisoner

by your family’s ritual pain

maybe part of being an adult means creating

your own legacy

your own traditions

your own joy

on Christmas Eve, everyone holds hands

sings and dances around the tree

then

a knock on the door

Santa comes in, pulls gifts out of his bag

bellows God jul! God jul alle sammen!

nervous children squeal with delight

when he calls their names

Espen’s eyes twinkle at you above Santa’s beard

your heart somersaults in your chest

the children play with their toys

the adults drink and tell stories

Santa pulls you into the pantry

kisses you through his curly white beard

you hand him a tissue-paper package

wrapped in ribbon and holly

he unwraps the sweater you knit

from the norsk Olympians’ pattern

he immediately sheds his Santa coat