Page 37 of The Pakhan’s Heir

I just need something to go to bed in. Something that will break his resolve the moment he sees me. And if, in the end, I gain nothing else, at least we’ll both get the release we’ve been needing.

I walk around the rack, looking through each ensemble, trying to picture myself wearing them, when loud laughter grabs my attention. I look up just in time to see a group of teenage boys as they pass by the store entrance. One of them just pushed his friend toward the door, saying. “Go on, get some panties, you pussy!”

The boy’s face goes red and he punches his friend in the shoulder. The whole bunch of them are laughing and tripping over themselves as they pass by. Ugh. I’m glad I’m not a teenager anymore. To think I used to find guys like that hot.

I go to turn my attention back to the rack when I spot something right outside. I look back to see a man in a leather jacket walking by. He’s glancing over his shoulder as if he’s being followed.

He slips into the hallway between two stores and as he does, I realize that I know this person. The dark hair with a little gray on the sides, the rough beard, and soft blue eyes.

It’s one of Alex’s people. His friend, I think. Gedeon… yeah, Gedeon’s his name. He’s close with Rikki and one of the higher ranked brigadiers. They talk about him like he’s a third Molotov brother.

What is he doing here?

I watch as he steps into the shaft of flickering lighting overhead and a moment later, a different man comes walking out from another door somewhere just behind him. They shake hands, smile, and start talking to one another. All the while, looking around for anyone who might be listening.

“Are you finding everything okay?”

I start to find that the checkout girl is now standing next to me. Now that I’m this close to her, I can see she’s got on glitter eyeshadow to match her lipstick. I smile at her and ask, “Have you got anything in a size nine or ten, maybe? Maybe something with a little less fringe and more satin or silk?”

She nods and says, “Sure. Over here.”

As she walks away, leading me to another rack across the room, I look back at the flickering walkway. Gedeon’s gone.

He was supposed to be up here at least an hour ago. I’m standing here looking at myself in the mirror one last time in the lingerie I settled on. I’ve been second guessing it ever since I put it on. It’s a red satin teddy with lace fringe over the top of the bra. It fits me well, coming down about halfway across my ass so the bottoms of my matching panties can be seen. I like how it feels on me. Smooth and comfortable…

I should have chosen the bra and panty set that I almost got. The moment when he ripped my panties off me that first night lives rent free in my head. It’d be nice if he did it again.

But he has to be here to do it. And I feel stupid just standing here waiting for him to notice my half-nakedness. I slump my shoulders as I glance up at the alarm clock on his nightstand. Fuck.

I sigh and grab my robe. Well, I might as well get a snack and then go to bed. Wherever he is tonight, I’m not about to wait up for him like some puppy.

On my way downstairs, I start to think about the other alternative to this whole, stupid thing I’ve been forced to do. Running. The money I have isn’t mine. It’s never been mine. It was my father’s and now it’s my husband’s. I don’t know how far I would get without anything and I don’t dare steal it. The Bratvas would never stop hunting me down.

As I look through the kitchen cabinets for the chocolate chip cookies I stashed here, I realize that I’m just tired, mentally and physically. This entire experience has been draining me day by day.

I find my pack of cookies and I lean against the counter as I open the bag and pull out one to eat. I stand here and munch on chocolate chip cookies, wondering how I can get my husband to fuck my brains out.

And then I hear what sounds like pool balls. It’s faint… but I definitely hear it.

So. He’s home and he’s in the game room. Wonder if he’s taking a late meeting. I eat a couple more cookies, listening to the heavy balls bang against one another. Slowly, I realize I don’t hear any voices.

He’s in there alone. Suddenly, Yeva’s encouragement comes back to me. That innocent act isn’t going to fly with Alex.

Innocent act. Like some timid little thing hiding in the bedroom waiting for him to find me. Well, that’s one thing that I’m not. Not anymore.

I set down the cookies and leave the kitchen.

As I walk down the hall, I keep listening hard for any other voices. Or any voices at all. My anxiety is starting to get the better of me as I approach the door and my heart is beating a mile a minute. Every fear I’ve ever had starts to surface the closer I get…

You are not innocent, Nona. You are a beautiful, strong, sexy woman. You just need to let him know that.

I walk up to the door and I open it slowly. The game room is just as it always is, a big, overstuffed leather couch in one corner of the room in front of a fifty-inch screen that I’ve never seen turned on in the few weeks I’ve been here. An electronic dartboard in the far corner, and an air hockey table against the wall… A variety of items that I imagine he and his brothers use for entertainment.

He’s leaning over the pool table, the cue in hand and pointing toward one of the balls. He glances over his shoulder at me, then turns his focus back to the game.

“What are you doing down here?” he says.

“You haven’t come to bed yet,” I say as casually as I can. “I thought you weren’t home. Then I heard you in here.”