Page 164 of Fame & Chaos

“Oh, I fucking do!” Bending down, I grab Indi’s giant pink teddy bear from the grass before shoving past Sasha hard enough to knock her sideways.

She stumbles with tears streaming down her face.

I don’t look back.

Another crack of thunder splits the sky overhead as I drag my cell phone from my pocket with shaking hands and desperately try to call the love of my life.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Indi

My heart is thumping so fast I can barely breathe. My vision is blurred from tears, and I can’t see where I’m going as my head pounds so violently that I feel sick. The upbeat music around me feels mocking, the cheerful sound twisting in my skull until the whole world spins. I stumble through the crowd, desperately trying to catch my breath while crashing into people and rides because I’m too disoriented to focus on anything properly. I have no idea where I am, other than the fact that I’m at the funfair and Caleb cheated on me with that woman.

I feel like my world has come full circle.

Everything is overwhelming me as I sob uncontrollably. I clap my hands over my ears to block out the music infiltrating my head and making it pound harder, but nothing helps. The panic won’t ease. The pain won’t stop. My chest tightens so viciously that it feels like I’m having a heart attack as I clutch at it for dear life. All I can hear are people laughing, music blaring, rides creaking, and children screaming. Every sound crashes into me until nausea churns in my stomach.

I can’t take it anymore.

The lights, the noise, the pain, the confusion… it’s too much.

I need to get out of here.

A broken cry tears from my throat as I start running. I don’t even know where I’m going. I can’t remember where the exit is, but I keep pushing through the crowd while people stare at me like I’m some sort of freak.

I am a freak.

I must be.

Caleb can’t stay faithful to me… ever. So clearly I’m not worthy of it. I knew I shouldn’t have trusted him. I knew I shouldn’t have believed him.

Why else would nothing have happened with Maddie after school?

I saw her hands moving to his dick. What more proof do I need?

I’m so stupidly naive.

How could I ever think we would work? I knew he was a serial womanizer. I knew he loved the rock star lifestyle. How could I possibly believe I would ever be enough for someone like him?

Sobbing harder, I finally find the exit and stumble through it while searching for my car. Thank God I have the keys because Caleb can find his own way home, the lying, cheating, scum-sucking arsehole.

I yank open the car door, collapse into the driver’s seat, and cry into my hands. I can’t believe this is happening. I genuinely thought we were happy. In the few short days we’d been together, everything had felt perfect, like there was no possible way things could fall apart this quickly.

I love him.

I’m so hopelessly, undeniably in love with him.

And he’s shattered my heart so completely I don’t think I could ever love someone this way again. Will I get into another relationship one day? I honestly don’t know. But will I ever love anyone as deeply as I love Caleb right now? Never.

I can never love like this again.

Because right now I feel like I’m drowning. Like I’m trapped beneath violent waves, and instead of holding me up the way he promised he would, he’s the one forcing me under. He’s the reason I’m suffocating. He’s the reason I feel like I’m dying inside, and he’s the reason my heart won’t survive this.

I sob harder into my hands when my cell starts ringing in my pocket. The sound startles me so badly that I jump, then drag it out and stare mindlessly at the screen. My vision is too blurry to make anything out, so I wipe my eyes and squint until Caleb’s name comes into focus.

Rage explodes through me.

It bubbles up so violently I can’t contain it. I hurl the phone across the car and grip the steering wheel so tightly my hands ache as I shake it violently, letting out a strangled moan of frustration. I’m hurting so badly, and even this tiny release of anger doesn’t help.