Page 146 of Fame & Rhythm

I drop to the ground, the weight of it all crashing down on me at once. This is it. I didn’t just mess it up, I destroyed it.

Completely.

I stay there for what feels like hours, curled into myself beneath the tree, shivering as the night drags on. Music and laughter drift across from the party, but it feels like it’s coming from another world.

Eventually, I force myself to stand. My head spins a little… too much emotion, too little food, and the champagne is not helping.

I steady myself and make my way back.

I don’t care what I look like.

I slip around the back of the gazebo and duck behind the bar, grabbing a bottle of bourbon without a second thought. If I’m going to get through tonight, I need to forget it ever happened.

Bottle in hand, I head inside and up the stairs.

The kitchen door swings open, and I step through, only to come face-to-face with Amber.

Her eyes drag over me, taking in everything. “Jesus, Annie… are you okay? You look terrible.”

I let out a short, hollow scoff and walk straight past her, not saying a word.

I keep going, straight to my room, ready to shut the world out and drink until I don’t feel anything at all.

***

The next morning, I wake with a pounding headache and a stomach that feels like it’s been through a war.

I managed about a third of the bourbon before everything went fuzzy. Bits and pieces come back to me, but the one thing that sticks, the one thing that won’t blur, is Aston walking away.

That part is crystal clear.

I think Mum came in at some point. I vaguely remember her taking the bottle off me, but I have no idea what I said… and honestly, I’m not sure I want to.

I push myself up slowly, immediately regretting it as my stomach churns. Saliva floods my mouth, and I barely make it to the upstairs bathroom before I’m on my knees, throwing up.

It’s mostly alcohol.

My throat burns as I heave, my body shuddering with each wave.

The door opens behind me, and a familiar hand settles on my back.

“Oh, Annie,” Mum murmurs, gently pulling my hair away from my face as I continue to be sick.

Tears start to fall, mixing with everything else, and when the worst of it passes, she sinks beside me on the floor.

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” she says softly, drawing me into her. “Let it out.”

I lean into her, pressing my face into her shoulder as the tears come harder now.

“I think it’s time you lay off the booze,” she adds gently.

I nod, sniffling as I wipe at my face. “I know. I’m sorry, Mum.”

She hugs me tighter. “It’s okay. But you need to talk to Dr. Ludwick about you and Aston. You’ve been avoiding it for months, and I think seeing him with Amber last night hit you harder than you expected…” She pauses. “At least, that’s what I gathered from the slurred words and all the crying.”

I wince. “Was I that bad? I can’t really remember.”

She tilts her head, letting out a quiet sigh. “Annie… I know you’re hurting. But getting drunk alone in your room isn’t the answer.”