Page 236 of The Encore’s Crown

Her fingers move slowly against my shirt. Then her mouth curves.

“I guess it would fit you anyway. You’re already kind of a daddy.”

I give her a long look. My brows lift as she traces one finger lazily over my chest. She knows exactly what she just did, that innocent expression only makes it worse.

“I kind of liked hearing you say that.” I narrow my eyes at her. “Not sure what that says about me.”

Her smile turns wicked before she leans in and kisses me, slow enough that I feel it everywhere. When she pulls back, I shake my head.

“You enjoy the practicing-for-a-baby part way too fucking much.”

“That part is extremely important.” Natalia looks back at me, and the teasing slips from her face, her expression turning serious. "Just because we aren't doing this right now doesn’t mean it’s never.”

My hand stills in her hair. She looks nervous saying it, but she doesn’t look trapped.

“I have things I want to do first,” she says. “Things I want us to do. I want more time where it’s just us and I can go somewhere without packing diapers or wondering whether a baby is about to ruin couture. But someday?”

“But someday?” Her expression softens at the strange hope creeping into my voice, like she hears it before I even understand what it means.

“I like the idea. Someday.”

“Ma would lose her mind over a grandbaby,” I say. “Can you imagine how happy she’d be?”

Natalia nods, tucking herself back against my chest.

“Mama would lose her mind for the first ten minutes because it’s me, her baby, ruining my life. Then she’d start planning outfits for the christening.”

“Ma would argue about the christening.”

“Mama would win.”

“You haven’t seen Ma when she wants something.”

“I’ve watched them fight over dumplings. There would be blood.”

I laugh quietly, feeling each breath move through the space between us.

“I want a baby as fat as you were in those pictures.” She pinches my side before I can object. “You had wrists like dinner rolls.”

“I was a healthy baby.”

“You were huge.” She smiles. “I want an adorable squishy one I can bite.”

I laugh and kiss the tip of her nose.

“Of course you do.”

I keep running my hand through her hair, imagining something I spent years refusing to let exist. A future that doesn’t end with me becoming my dad, and a home where no one fears the door opening. A child who knows my hands only as something that holds, carries, fixes, catches.

“So,” I say after a while. “If we did decide to, in the future—I mean, only if you wanted, maybe. I was just—”

Natalia lifts her head.

“If we had a boy someday…” My throat tightens, but I don’t look away.

“Maybe we could name him Piotr.”