Page 513 of Lessons in Cruelty

I’m the monster here.

I’ve always been the monster.

The pleasure should be overwhelming, but all I can think about is how wrong I’ve been. How much I’ve hurt her. How she’s giving me this perfect moment when I don’t deserve a single fucking second.

I should push her away.

But I want her.

Need her.

Haven gives my balls another gentle squeeze, the crown of my cock another lingering swirl, and those awful thoughts dissolve. Her fingers trail lower, teasing the strip of sensitive skin between my ass and balls. A feather-light touch, but I’m way too fucking sensitive not to feel it.

I tense, an uneasy anticipation buzzing in my gut.

She’d better not be planning any of that bullshit she pulled at Rooke’s house the other day.

But then she swirls her tongue, and everything scrambles

“Fuuuck…”

“You like that?”

“Jesus.”

Should have known she was just buttering me up.

Knocking down my defenses so I’d be less suspicious.

She knows exactly what she’s doing to me, and she’s enjoying every second of my destruction.

Haven takes an inch of my cock into her mouth. The hand still wrapped around my balls slides down, and she pushes her finger into my asshole.

“Hey!” My body stiffens in shock, but all that does is clench my ass cheeks, and I guess she takes that as encouragement, because she slides her finger in deeper and starts pumping it in and out. Even tightening the fist in her hair doesn’t make her stop. Even grabbing her wrist.

“Stop! Haven, fucking…” My words trail off in a guttural, rattling groan.

I come so hard I hit Haven in the face even though she’s almost a foot away from my dick. She flinches, laughing as she turns away to wipe at her face.

But I don’t let her wipe away anything.

I can’t fucking stand the loss—her being anywhere but here.

I slap my hand around the one holding my cock, trapping her, and force her head back into my lap with the fist in her hair. The desperate moan she makes when I hit the back of her throat is surreal.

Haven gags, but doesn’t pull away, and I can’t stop myself from groaning.

She’s perfect.

Too fucking perfect.

Her mouth closes over my cock again, drinking down whatever’s left of me. And, fuck me, when I drag her up and taste her—taste myself on her lips—my insides twist so tight, it feels like they’ll snap.

Our kiss is messy and crass, bordering on chaotic.

But it’s everything I am, and everything she’s always been.

A hot fucking mess.