Page 62 of Touch of Class

Stepping back, she shook her head. “Excuse me. I don’t know why I’m acting like this. It’s not your fault. It’s mine. Apparently, so much of this has always been my fault, which is only to say I’ve been wondering, perhaps to the point of distraction, what might’ve been different if I hadn’t misread the situation.”

“You mean how might our lives have been different if you’d stuck around long enough to kiss me, or if I hadn’t laughed and given you a reason to run in the first place?”

“It’s silly.” Gillian tried to shake the thought. “We were kids. It couldn’t have changed much, not in any practical way.”

Daphne seemed to consider the question. “Who knows, maybe one of us would’ve been the world’s greatest kisser and we never even knew it.”

“And now you’re teasing again?”

Daphne smiled, making the answer clear, but, for some reason, Gillian’s gaze was drawn to one upturned corner of her mouth again. God, what was wrong with her?

“I don’t know what else we can do,” Daphne admitted. “We can’t know. And really, how many kisses have changed much about your life?”

Gillian could remember several good ones, maybe a handful that shifted her trajectory for a while, but never for long. “I guess odds are we would’ve been awkward and made things worse between us.”

I don’t know,” Daphne admitted. “I may’ve liked you more if I’d seen any hint of awkwardness in you. Maybe a bad kiss could’ve at least let us part on better terms.”

Gillian gave that some thought. “What do you think that would’ve meant for us now?”

Daphne thought for a moment. “It’s weird to wonder what it’d be like if we weren’t constantly on edge around each other, but I guess if we’d left on better terms, we might’ve reunited differently, too. Probably not as friends, I mean, you’d still be uptight as fuck.”

“And you’d still be an agent of chaos with a bed in your office,” Gillian shot back, but this time without any venom.

“Obviously.” Daphne chuckled. “But instead of active animosity and outright tension, maybe it could’ve just been a quirky thing. I would’ve introduced you to Hugh and Izzy as someone I used to know, and you would’ve told your friends a silly story about high school. Then we would’ve gone about our business, though my business would still rub you the wrong way.”

“Probably,” she admitted, but she didn’t hate the softer edges on the story. Maybe if not for her and Daphne’s shared history of animosity, she would’ve felt safer being curious instead of defensive when she’d learned about the whole snuggery thing.

“We’ll never know,” Daphne finally said.

“No way to tell.” Gillian agreed, but her eyes once again dropped to that mouth across from her. “Unless.”

Daphne raised her eyebrows. “Unless?”

Gillian shook her head. “We’re entirely different people.”

Daphne’s smile spread. “For a second there I thought you were going to take Robin’s advice.”

“Something I very rarely do.”

“Why? Is she a bad therapist?”

“Absolutely not. She’s unconventional and occasionally juvenile, but that’s part of what works for her. She’s disarming enough for her skill and intelligence to sneak up on you. She’s probably the brightest practitioner I’ve ever witnessed working with adolescents and young adults.”

“So, she specializes in exactly the age we were when we went off track?”

“You and I went off track the moment we met in middle school, but to the larger point, she’s got a solid track record of reauthoring trauma. One such exercise ended up with Sawyer in her bed and my office in disarray.”

“Does that happen to you often?”

“More than I care for,” she said emphatically, but the idea she hadn’t wanted to allow to take root had already done exactly that even as her brain rebelled. “I’m not generally as hands-on in my approach.”

“As hands-on as Robin is with Sawyer?” Daphne laughed lightly. “Probably best in your line of work.”

“But not in yours.”

“To be fair, their relationship is also off limits in my line of work, but I understand you’re more research oriented.”

“Right,” Gillian said. “Research. I love research. Generally, the clinical kind, which would not help us here.”