Page 220 of The Discount Damsel

“I heard you. I just, um, got distracted.”

He hurried over to his dresser for some fresh underwear. He tossed a pair to the princess pirate, who quickly shimmied into them under his bathrobe.

“Well undistract yourself. And, Millie, Sir Eustace is requesting you.”

“Is he?” She collected her heap of yesterday’s clothing and got to dressing.

Dirk lingered. “So I’m assuming Pocket didn’t want me to interrupt you two because⁠—”

He gasped when the puzzle pieces shuttled into place. The tangled bedsheets; the two humans who had, up until very recently, had been very naked; the fact he hadn’t seen them all evening after the party.

“Bradley Donmarin! Have you finally done what all the apprentices were talking about at the College? Have you finally gotten laid?”

“Why don’t you get the coffee started?” he barked.

“It’s already made. This time,” the baby dragon said smugly, “it was you who slept in.”

When his princess was ready, Dirk lifted her with his magic and flew out of the tower and down to the sand where Sir Eustace waited. His camp was entirely packed away into his rucksack—tent, cot, stove, bezoars, books, rugs, even the potted tangelo tree. Duchess the cat sat in the shade at his feet. At Millie’s arrival, the ministry official unclasped his hands and straightened his suit jacket with a little tug.

“Your Highness,” he greeted, oddly cordial.

“Sir Eustace, good morning.”

He inclined his head. “I’m off today, back to home office to submit my chronicle of this”—he swallowed back what had to be a harsh word and selected a more affable one—“experience.”

“I wish you an uneventful journey, Sir Eustace.”

His eyebrows quirked. That is exactly what he wished for. Something told him it wasn’t the offhanded pleasantry many royals offered just to keep the conversation moving along. This princess meant it because she understood him.

Sir Eustace wet his lips, unsure what this revelation meant to him. Best to stay on subject. “Before I left, I wanted to let you know what a pleasure it has been to spend time with Duchess. She is a rare soul, and my life has been made the better for knowing her. I . . . just wanted to make sure she was in proper care before I took my leave.”

Duchess looked up at him, trilled softly, and curled her tail around his ankle. The portly little man wiped a tear from the corner of his eye and stiffened his spine.

Smothering a smile, Millie knelt and extended her hand to the cat. “Duchess. Come tell Mummy good-bye.”

“What?” Sir Eustace sputtered.

The Persian mewed and padded over to the princess for a cuddle and a chin scratch. “My life has never been well suited for a cat of Duchess’s preferences. She wants to be adored and pampered and waste her days on a pillow in the sun with a can of caviar within paw’s reach. Not be dragged on harebrained adventures. She has been very tolerant of me, but I think she would be much happier off with you, Sir Eustace. That is, if you’re willing to give her the life she deserves.”

“Willing? Why, Your Highness, it would be the greatest honor of my life!”

When Millie leaned forward to transfer Duchess into her new papa’s arms, Dirk surged forward. “Wait just a minute. You give her to him and I’ll never get to give her a proper good-bye.”

Duchess’s purr was loud and comforting as Dirk held her in front of his nose for a good long sniff. “No other cat will smell as good as you.”

She trilled again, agreeing whole-heartedly. She knew her strengths.

Sir Eustace’s iridescent eyes sparkled with happy tears when the cat was finally transferred to his embrace. Instead of lounging in the cradle of his arms, Duchess draped herself over his shoulder and told him in no uncertain terms how much she loved her new living arrangements and her new papa—she drooled onto his ear.

“Oh!” the little man exclaimed softly, truly touched. Then a moment of panic: “My bag. I couldn’t possibly set this goddess down and ruin our bonding session⁠—”

“I’ve got it.” With a flick of his tail and a flurry of his claws, Dirk lifted the heavy rucksack off the ground and held it aloft for the ministry official to thread his arms into the straps.

Sir Eustace smiled gratefully. “Many thanks, Dragon.”

“I, uh, don’t suppose I could get any of those points back?”

The smile vanished. “Not a chance. Good day, to the both of you.”