Page 51 of Unmasking Her Shadow

“Fuck, Sam, no-”

“You exploited my desires to make me fall for you.”

“What? No.” My feet carry me to her instantly, and I’m cradling her face in my hands, forcing her to look at me. “I would NEVER do anything to hurt you…ever. I’ve known you longer than you’ve known me. That’s all.”

“Show me,” she demands with tears in her eyes, and my breathing matches hers. I can hardly hear my own thoughts over the pounding of my heart.

I drop my hands and walk a few steps backward. My stomach twists and I feel like I’m going to throw up as I grab the bottom of the mask. She looks like she is about to break, and I hesitate, wanting to hold her together. My head drops, and I pull my hood back and rip the mask off, my gaze remaining on the ground as I try to pull myself together. I grab the bottom of my balaclava and lock eyes with hers, removing the final layer of my secret sin.

She stills and her breath catches in her throat. “Kioni?” Her voice cracks. “I trusted you,” she sobs.

“Sam,” I plead, stepping towards her, and she throws her trembling hands up, stopping me.

“Red.”

“Okay…Red,” I correct, using the nickname Ki uses for her.

“No, Kioni,” she croaks. “Red…not green, not yellow. Red.” She wipes her eyes and turns around, sprinting towards her house.

The word pierces my heart like a blade. The darkness is too loud. It’s suffocating me. I fall to my knees, gripping my chest. My lips tremble and silent tears rush down my cheeks as I watch her disappear.

She just needs time to breathe, and she will come back.

She will come back to me.

She will come back to green.

33

Sam

Nyx whines next to me and licks another one of my tears away. I’ve been stuck in this bed since last night, unable to gather an ounce of strength to move. Not even to go to the bathroom, to which my full bladder is becoming painful. My heart doesn’t hurt as badly now, but it still doesn’t feel very pleasant either. It’s not like I would have wanted Shadow to be anyone else.

The reasons behind what she did are obvious, and I understand them now. I probably wouldn’t have met her that night if I had known she was a woman. To be honest, I never knew a woman could do the things she did and make me feel that…good. It makes sense now why I was always blindfolded or faced away from Shadow. I would have seen she didn’t actually have a cock. Well, she did. It was just fake. How did I not notice it was a dildo? Was it the condom she used? Or was it because I was always overwhelmed by so many sensations at once that I didn’t have time to contemplate if I was being fucked by silicone or flesh?

I groan and force my legs over my bed and rush to the bathroom to relieve myself. Someone had been stalking me for months and months, and I never knew. How pathetic are my survival skills? Where are the cameras hidden? Do I even care? The hurt I felt when she revealed herself is lessening now that I have sorted through a lot of the madness. Kioni is literally everything I have ever wished for. I found someone who will feed my wicked desires but also treat me like I’m precious and never make me feel like I’m messed up.

I should hate her, but I don’t. At first, I think I did, for a few seconds anyway. But as soon as I got to my house, she was the only one I wanted to comfort me. Either her…or Shadow. I know they are the same person now, but it’s like Shadow is her alter ego that was formed for my own fucked-up needs. But she has to be just as messed up as I am. She cut off a man’s finger, for crying out loud! All to keep us intact because I wasn’t with her yet. We hadn’t had time to form our bond outside of the shadows.

Will she still be my shadow if we remain together? Picturing her in those masks without the layers of clothing to hide her build from me is a picture I want to hang in my mind for ages, right next to the mental note that I needed to seek therapy and never did. When I walk back to my bedroom, I rip down my wall of suspects that I had abandoned. It didn’t really matter who was behind the mask as long as it wasn’t Tyler. The sound of a motorcycle pulling into my driveway makes me jump. I’m not ready to see her yet.

“Wake up, sunshine,” Ryker yells loudly while banging on my front door. A deep growl rumbles in Nyx’s throat, and she leads the way downstairs. I unlock the door, and Ryker pushes it open but freezes with his hand on the door when he spots Nyx at my side.

“Fucking asshole,” he mutters, removing his hand slowly and stepping backward. Her eyes follow his movements. “Ki didn’t warn me you had a new dog.”

I scratch her head and chuckle, picturing Kioni running around my house, trying not to get bitten that first night. It makes it funnier now that I know it was her and why she was so timid of Nyx when she came over as herself the next time.

“She asked me to check on you. Said you didn’t watch your sunrise this morning or gotten out of bed at all for that matter.”

She’s still watching me. “Why didn’t she come herself?”

“She can’t,” he replies, as if I should already know this.

“What do you mean she can’t?”

“You said the only word that would make her stay away.”

Red.