Page 86 of Do It With Me

CHAPTER 38

HOLDEN

I led her into my office, my hand in the small of her back and my heart pounding like it was trying to break out of my chest. Over the last few days, Jimmy and I hadn’t only been figuring out what to do about the Renewal Initiative, nor had he forgotten what I’d asked him after I’d learned about Sara’s illness.

It was ridiculous how nervous I was about showing her what else we’d been up to, though. I’d faced down furious shareholders and confronted journalists with hidden agendas, but this?

This was personal. It was perhaps the most personal thing I’d ever done for somebody else. Once Ellora found out that I’d been keeping something else from her, I didn’t know what to expect, but I knew this wouldn’t even just strike close to home. It was going to be a direct hit.

“So, uh, I wanted you to take a look at something.” I woke up the monitor on my desk. Squeezing her hand, I used the other to click into the folder on my desktop.

The logo popped up on the screen a moment later, the lines clean, simple, and elegant. Sara & Friends.

Ellora froze beside me, her jaw slackening before she swiveled to look up into my eyes, her own wider than I’d ever seen them. “What is that?”

“It’s a foundation,” I said quietly. “In your mother’s name. To support families of dementia patients. The aim is to help them get the care they need and to create a community for them to be part of.”

Her eyes filled with tears faster than I thought possible. “You did this? This is your foundation?”

“Yeah.” I ran a hand through my hair, suddenly very aware of how small this office felt with her in it. “Well, no. I started it, but it’s yours. Ours if you want it to be. I was going to tell you before, but I didn’t want you to think it was a stunt I pulled to win you back.”

“Holden…” she breathed, one of her palms gently cupping my face. “How did you do this? When on earth did you even have time for something like this?”

“I didn’t have time. I made it,” I said honestly. “Weeks ago. After you told me about your mother’s condition, I started looking into it. Jimmy has been working behind the scenes to get it up and running. Dr. Feldman is involved as well.”

She looked at me like I’d just torn down the whole sky so I could hand her the stars. “I can’t believe you did this.”

I swallowed, forcing out the truth before I lost my nerve. “I love you, Ellora. This is just a small way to show you how much.”

She stepped even closer, her free hand landing on my chest, her palm lightly resting right over my heartbeat. “I love you, too.”

My heart skipped and stuttered, emotions I’d never felt before—not even on my wedding day—racing through me. I leaned down and kissed her, promising without words that I was here and that I wasn’t going anywhere. Swearing that I would take care of her heart from now on and that I would never let anyone, including myself, hurt so much as a hair on her head.

Something buried deep inside me finally unclenched as she kissed me back the same way, as if she was giving herself to me and was promising all the same things. Every wall I’d built around myself crumbled, every neat little compartment where I’d stored things I didn’t want to feel gone.

These kisses weren’t careful or strategic. It wasn’t about timing, control, or any of the things I’d been good at my whole life. It was about her. Only about her.

Ellora. Ellora Langton has a pretty nice ring to it, actually.

Her fingers curled into my shirt, pulling me closer, and the world just disappeared. There was only the taste of her in my mouth and the quiet sounds she made. Sounds I wanted to hear for the rest of my life even though I’d sworn up and down for five years that I would never, ever go there again.

I deepened the kiss, one of my hands sliding into her hair and the other tracing the curve of her spine, committing every inch to memory. She fit against me like I’d been built with this moment in mind.

Like every step, every mistake, every failure, and every success had led me right here. To her.

When she whispered my name, I felt it everywhere. I pulled back just enough to look at her, my forehead resting against hers. “You have no idea what you’ve done to me.”

She smiled, a little breathless as she brought her eyes up to mine in the moonlight. “I think I do.”

I kissed her again, my hands finding both of hers and our fingers lacing. I walked her backward through the penthouse, down the hallway I’d walked a thousand times, but never like this. Every step suddenly felt new, like the entire world had just fallen open to me.

We reached my bedroom and I hesitated just long enough to brush my thumb along her cheek. She looked up at me like she already knew what I was thinking, like she knew that this was about finally letting myself love her completely. Then she rose up on her toes and kissed me again, and I stopped thinking altogether.

Acting on pure instinct, I slid my hands to her back and found the top of her zipper. She was still wearing the dress Maia had sent over to our offices this morning, a fitted, businesslike navy wrap that had nearly undone me when I’d seen her in it.

On the other hand, she could wear a plastic bag and it would have the same effect. My knuckles brushed against her spine as I unzipped the dress, slowly dragging the metal tab down one inch at a time. Ellora shivered against me, her breathing choppy by the time it was all the way open.

I hooked my fingers under the sleeves, caressing her shoulders before I pushed the fabric down. It pooled around her waist, bunching between our bodies. Reaching around her again, I unhooked her bra and dropped it to the floor. My mouth never left hers as I rolled her panties off with the dress.