“That’s the problem,” I interrupted, my voice rising. “You didn’t realize because you didn’t think. You didn’t stop for one damn second to consider what this space might mean to me.”
Her face crumpled, and I could see the tears flowing, but I couldn’t stop. The words kept coming, harsh and cutting, like a flood I couldn’t contain. I couldn’t remember the last time I had been so angry. I was enraged.
“This room isn’t just some part of the house, Kaira. It’s sacred. It’s the one place I’ve kept untouched, untainted, because it’s all I have left of her.”
“Roman—”
“Don’t,” I snapped, holding up a hand to stop her. “Don’t try to justify it. You broke my trust, Kaira. The one thing I asked you not to do, and you couldn’t even respect that.”
Her lip quivered with tears spilling down her cheeks. She stepped closer, her hands outstretched as if to placate me. “I know I was wrong. I know I shouldn’t have come in here. But I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t realize how much this room means to you. I thought… I don’t know what I thought.”
“Clearly,” I said bitterly, turning away from her. The sight of her standing there, looking so small and vulnerable, only made my anger worse. Not at her, but at myself—for letting her get close enough to have the power to hurt me like this.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her voice breaking. “I was wrong, and I’m sorry. Please, can we just sit down and talk about this? Let me explain.”
I turned back to her. The sight of tears streaming down her face clawed at my heart. But the anger, the betrayal—it was still too fresh. “What’s there to talk about, Kaira? You broke my trust. That’s all there is to it.”
“I didn’t mean to—”
“But you did!” I shouted, cutting her off. “You did, and now this place feels tainted. This was my sanctuary, Kaira. The one place in this whole damn house that was just mine. And now—” My voice cracked. I stopped, swallowing hard to regain control.
She was crying openly now, her hands clasped together as if in prayer. “Roman, please. I’ll do anything to make this right. Just tell me how.”
I shook my head, the frustration bubbling up again. “You can’t. There’s no fixing this.”
I stared at her, the anger and hurt battling inside me. Part of me wanted to lash out, to push her away before she could do any more damage. But another part, the part that had grown so attached to her over these past few weeks, ached to pull her close and soothe the pain I’d caused.
Kaira was shaking, her shoulders trembling with the force of her sobs. “Roman, please,” she choked out. “I never meant to violate something so sacred. I was just curious. Stupid and reckless, but not malicious. I would never do anything to hurt you. I know you know that.”
“No, Kaira. I don’t know that.” I stared at her, the anguish and regret written all over her beautiful face. For the first time since we’d gotten to know each other, doubt began to creep in. Had she really been playing me this entire time? Was this all just part of an act to get close to me, to take advantage of my money and status?
The dark and insidious thoughts were like a cloud coming in. I had been so certain, so confident in her and in us. But now, as I looked at the violated space around me, that confidence crumbled.
“Just… just go to bed, Kaira. I can’t do this right now. I’m going to say something I don’t mean.”
Her eyes widened, and she opened her mouth to protest, but I held up a hand to stop her. “Go. I’m serious. You don’t know me well enough to know just how big of a dick I can be. Get away from me.”
She hesitated for a moment, her shoulders shaking as she wiped at her eyes. “I know you don’t believe me, but I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I would never do anything that hurt you. I know you’re angry. But just know I’m here for you.”
I said nothing. I wasn’t joking when I warned her. I knew I could wield my tongue like a vicious sword. I had the uncanny ability to cut people down with my coldness.
Without another word, she turned and walked out of the room.
I stood there for a long time after she left, staring at my mother’s paintings. The beauty that once brought me peace now felt muted. It was all overshadowed by the weight of what had just happened.
When I finally left the studio and closed the door behind me, I heard it. The faint sound of Kaira crying in her room. It pierced through the walls, through my defenses, and straight into my chest. Hearing her in pain physically hurt me.
But I couldn’t offer her comfort.
I made it to my own room, closed the door, and leaned against it, letting my head fall back with a heavy thud. My fists were clenched so tight my knuckles ached, but I couldn’t bring myself to relax.
The storm was back, raging inside me like it hadn’t in years. I hadn’t felt this way since… since before her. Since before Kaira walked into my life and turned it upside down in the best and worst ways.
I should’ve been able to forgive her. To see past the mistake and focus on the fact that she cared enough to want to know more about me. But all I could feel was the sting of betrayal. The board’s warnings playing over and over in my head.
What if they were right? What if I’d let my guard down too soon?
No. I pushed the thought away, shaking my head as if to physically dislodge it. This wasn’t about my board or their warnings. This was about her. About us.