Page 100 of Pick Me This Time

47

STERLING

The last night of the fall festival was usually a huge party, but this year, it seemed to be lacking. There was nothing overtly wrong, but the atmosphere wasn’t nearly as festive, and everything about it just felt off.

At least I was getting to spend some time with Jake before I left. He’d finally gotten Rachel out of the house to enjoy the festival with the baby, and the three of us had found a cozy corner inside a tent that had been decked out as a bar and bistro.

Rachel had taken Lizzy to meet a few of the locals and Jake and I were at our table, him staring at me with wide eyes after I’d admitted I was going back to New York. He frowned deeply, quiet for another beat before he finally found his voice again.

“Why?” he asked. “Is this about your Dad?”

“Surprisingly, it’s not.” I sipped my beer and enjoyed the scent of pumpkin spice and fall in Allisburg while I still could. “Dad and I have been doing better every day.”

“I noticed the last time I was there that you won the fight about hiring more help,” he said. “That doesn’t explain why you’re leaving, though. If you and your dad are getting along and the farm is doing better with you here, then why the hell would you go?”

I shrugged, but there was nothing nonchalant about the way I felt about the decision I’d made. “It’s time for me to go home.”

“This is home,” he said, still frowning and inclining his head to one side as he regarded me thoughtfully. “I miss having you around and this is where you belong. I mean, look around. I remember how the farm used to draw massive crowds for the festival when we were younger, but it’s different now. It’s getting worse every year. You could change that. Restore it to its former glory.”

I chuckled. “I’m not so sure about that. Downtown isn’t doing too bad.”

He arched both eyebrows at me. “Really? Because the vibe just isn’t the same here, man. Besides, I saw how hard those guys were working on the farm. You can’t tell me you haven’t thought about ways to make it thrive again now that you’ve got more hands on deck to help.”

“Of course, I have, but I’d need to get my dad onboard, too. Things are better with us, but they’re not that good yet.”

He sighed. “Do you really think they’re going to get better if you leave again? You only just started getting onto the right track with him.”

“I know,” I admitted, glancing around the tent decorated with foliage and twinkle lights.

Round tables dotted the space and giant heaters had been placed in intervals around it. On the outskirts, fires roared and people were merry, drinking and dancing to the tune being played by a local band up on the makeshift stage.

It was the exact scene we used to have on the farm back when my mom had still been in charge of the festival, but Jake was right. Something really was different.

In a way, it felt like the festival had taken on a life of its own. It now had an entire planning committee instead of just my mom and a few of her friends lending a hand. The committee had done a good job of it and I couldn’t put my finger on what was bothering me, but it really just wasn’t the same.

Jake picked at the label of his beer, his eyes searching the crowd until they came to rest on his wife. He smiled.

“She’s not going to be happy with you, you know,” he said before glancing back at me. “Daphne finally told her what’s been going on and she’s super excited. She thinks you’re going to put a ring on it and give Lizzy a whole bunch of kids to play with when she’s a little bit older.”

My heart gave a dull pang. “You know then?”

“Please.” He rolled his eyes. “My wife tells me everything, but I’m good at keeping secrets. I’m not so sure I’d have been good at keeping this from Eric, but I would’ve tried. For you. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Eric,” I said. “I didn’t want to ask you to lie to him on my behalf. It just didn’t feel right. I’ve been gone a decade and you guys have been as tight as ever for all that time. To get between you when I didn’t even really know what was going on between us would’ve been a dick move.”

“Fair enough,” he said after thinking it over for a beat. “What happens with that now, though? You’re just leaving?”

My chin dropped in a nod, but my heart was rebelling against it. It had been that way ever since I’d made the decision. I’d chosen to let my brain lead the way instead of following my heart, and the useless organ in my chest wasn’t enjoying the ride.

“There’s no point staying here, man,” I finally said. “Daphne has never pushed me for more. Never even mentioned a relationship. It’s always just been about me going back.”

“Did you ask her if she wants you to stay?”

I shook my head. “Again, there’s no point. I can’t stay even if she wants me to. Eric would probably rent a crowd to run me out of town with burning pitchforks.”

He snorted. “I doubt it. He missed you too, North. I know you guys aren’t seeing eye to eye on this, but he’d come around if you would stick around for long enough that he could get his head wrapped around it. No one even knew you two had a thing for each other.”

“We weren’t exactly advertising it,” I said, shrugging. “Both of us knew that Eric would lose his shit, and besides, it was new. There wasn’t much to say at first.”