Page 52 of Some Kinda Romance

She chuckled. “That boy of mine always does. He’s a thinker.”

Making a noncommittal sound in response, I stood up and motioned for her to follow me to the conference room. A giant touchscreen computer waited for us there, on a stand so it’d be easier to move people around.

I’d loaded a digital version of the venue on it, complete with the tables and the names of the guests who had already accepted the invitation. Diana and I spent the next hour settling the seating arrangements and I was pleased that everything was coming together so well.

When we were finally done, she turned to me, studying my face before she let out a soft sigh. “You know honey, I’m not sure if there’s something going on between you and my son. It’s not my business, but it seems you have some things to work on if there is.” She reached out and took both of my hands in her warm, strong grasp, squeezing my fingers reassuringly. “I know he’s not the easiest man to live with, but he is a good one.”

“Oh, I’m sure he is.” Somewhere deep, deep down inside, he had to be good. No one raised by someone like Diana could’ve turned out completely rotten, but he sure hid his goodness well.

Images flickered through my mind as I said it, though. I remembered his softer side, his honesty and his easy smiles once he’d opened up, and another pang of hurt traveled through me. He did have goodness in him.

I’d seen it. He was simply choosing not to let me see it anymore.

Diana didn’t leave it at that though, pressing on as she released my hands. “Dash wasn’t exactly happy about the wedding at first, but I’m sure you know that by now. His father’s passing damaged parts of him that I’m not sure will ever heal, but he’s trying. He’s trying to be happy for me, to help me have the day I want, and to be a better person on the other side of all this.”

She dragged in a deep breath, a sad smile on her lips as she held my gaze. “All of which is to say that if there is something going on between you two, just be patient. He’s worth the wait and whatever else may be going on right now.”

Still too mad to really listen, I nodded, not about to be a dick to Diana when she was only trying to be nice. “Thank you for the advice, but you don’t need to worry. We’re only working together for the sake of the wedding. There’s nothing else between us and I can handle a bit of pushback from a family member who loves the bride and only wants what’s best for her.”

She chuckled, but I could tell she didn’t really believe me. She left soon after that, and I exhaled with relief once she was gone. At least that was done now.

Not long after my office door had closed, it opened again and I sent up a quick prayer that neither of the St. Clairs had returned. Julie walked in with an apprehensive smile on her face and cocked her head at me. “And? How did it go?”

“Dash was Dash.” I sighed as I waved for her to take a seat. “At least he didn’t seem to have much to say today. That’s an improvement. Diana also sent him away before we even got started with the seating chart. I think she suspected we weren’t too happy to be together.”

Irritation surged through me when I thought about the meeting again. He was acting like an idiotic, entitled prick and I really didn’t like it. Plus, I was jealous of the women he’d been pictured with. I knew I had no right to be, but I couldn’t help it.

Even if I knew it might’ve been innocent, I didn’t want to be jealous at all. I didn’t want to care at all and I definitely didn’t want to want him, but unfortunately, none of those things could be helped.

Julie disappeared for a moment and I heard her asking Amelia to bring us some coffee. She strode back in, shut the door behind her, and sat down. “Are you okay? You kind of look like seeing him really took it out of you.”

I shook my head. “I just don’t understand why he was so worried about me wanting to use him for fame or exposure when he’s been pictured more since he met me, but without me, than I’ve ever seen him pictured before. If either of us is getting more exposure out of this, it’s him and I’m sure his business isn’t suffering for it.”

Julie let me vent and I was thankful that she didn’t try to help. I just needed to get this out of my system, and once I’d gotten started, it was difficult to stop. “I mean, I get that maybe people have used him in the past because of his name, but it’s ridiculous to accuse me of doing it when the press have been hounding me for years. Maybe he’s the one who was struggling to be relevant and that’s why he projected those feelings onto me. Maybe he was the St. Clair brother they weren’t really interested in until now.”

“Maybe,” she said, shrugging and not really appearing to believe it. “Either way, you know you’re not guilty of what he accused you of, so just ignore him.”

I smiled. “That’s exactly what I did. He kept staring at me, though. When I asked him if he had something to say, he said no, but he wouldn’t quit.”

“Yeah, well, I think he knows he was stupid to lose you, but it’s too late now,” she said. “On the bright side, I didn’t see any R-rated pictures of you two surface this morning, so Ethan must not have released them yet.”

I groaned, running my hands through my hair. Then I bowed my head, finally letting borderline hysterical laughter bubble out of me. “I knew Ethan would do something like this. I freaking knew it. I didn’t know it would be blackmail and I didn’t know when it would happen, but I knew it was coming eventually. He’d do anything to hurt me. To keep controlling me. I just…”

As I trailed off, I shook my head over and over again, the weight of it all threatening to crush me once more. “I just didn’t know he would stoop so low. Hacking the cameras in my building. I mean, what is that? It’s insane.”

“You got that right,” she said sympathetically as I wondered how I’d managed to develop such shitty taste in men.

It wasn’t genetic. My mother had chosen excellently with my father, and from what I knew about my grandparents, both my grandmothers had gotten it right as well. Which meant it was just me, putting all the women in my family who’d come before me to shame with my unbelievably poor choices.

But no more, I vowed silently. I was a kickass, independent woman who could take whatever came my way and face it alone, without the need for a partner who had never deserved me to begin with. Now if I can just keep remembering that, maybe I’ll finally manage to stop thinking about Dash and what might’ve been.

At this point, forgetting him felt impossible, but I had to keep trying until eventually, hopefully, I’d finally manage to do it.