Page 59 of The Only Way Is Up

‘It was entirely my fault,’ said Tom, and Daisy suspected he wasn’t talking about the door handle either.

Henry and Hank were both in Henry’s bed when they got back to Tom’s office, looking very cute, although the pile of reports on Tom’s desk looked suspiciously like they’d been snuffled about by a small animal. There didn’t seem to be any damage, however, so when Tom popped out to make coffee Daisy hastily straightened up the pile and did a quick frisk of the office for any smelly gifts Hank may have left behind. Hank watched her with a frantically wagging tail, and Daisy had to admit he was kind of adorable. She squatted down and stroked his pure white back, where a brown patch down each side met under his barrel of a belly. His head and ears were entirely brown apart from an inch of white that ran down his nose to his whiskery chin.

Archie had acquired Hank from a client whose husband had spent two years training the dog as a devoted companion, then dropped dead of a heart attack in Waitrose. The woman couldn’t bear to keep her dead husband’s pining dog and didn’t want to give him to a rescue centre, so she spent the time it took for Archie to design her a memorial garden persuading him to give Mr Tumnus a home. Simon had agreed on the condition they changed the dog’s name, since he categorically refused to shout ‘Mr Tumnus’ in any public space. Daisy remembered Simon’s call a year earlier, informing her that Archie was ‘on his way home from Narnia with a fucking dog.’ Since Archie’s surname was Williams, Hank was both suitably manly and secured his place as a fully fledged member of the family.

Tom came back with two mugs of instant coffee, so they sat on opposite sides of his desk and drafted the email to parents, detailing the dates and inviting children from each year group to sign up on a first-come, first-served basis. Classes were free, and they’d be welcome to take home whatever they cooked. Daisy insisted on covering the cost of ingredients but agreed that the school could order everything for her through their wholesalers. After a few minutes Hank abandoned Henry’s bed for Daisy’s lap, nudging her hand until she gently stroked between his ears while she and Tom worked through the details.

‘How do you feel about them bringing their phones?’ asked Tom. ‘I’m guessing some of them will want a photo.’

‘Definitely no phones,’ said Daisy emphatically, ‘apart from mine. I need to take pictures for Instagram.’ After what happened at the NTAs Daisy would happily ban smartphones entirely. ‘We should include that,’ she added, gesturing at the draft on Tom’s laptop. ‘Permission to use the pictures or video on social or in the book or whatever. I can’t be doing with having to remember which kids I can and can’t take pictures of. So if that’s a problem, parents shouldn’t sign them up.’

‘Fair enough,’ said Tom, tapping another paragraph into the email. ‘Anything else?’

Daisy thought for a moment. ‘No food allergies,’ she said. ‘Vegans are fine, but after the few months I’ve had, I’d probably kill someone with a walnut.’

‘Agreed,’ said Tom. ‘That’s everything, I think. I’ll get Angela to send it out to parents next week.’

‘Right,’ said Daisy, feeling like she was being dismissed. ‘Is there anything else?’

‘I don’t think so,’ said Tom, eyeing her carefully. ‘Do you?’

Daisy took a deep breath and gathered up her belongings, wishing she could just tell him everything, then reminding herself that it was better in the long run if he thought she was a shitty human being.

‘No,’ said Daisy. ‘I think we’re all done.’

Daisy walked Hank back across the school field, letting the fresh air blow away her sadness and pain over Tom, and hoping it would all be worth it. Justin was unloading his wheelbarrow when Daisy walked round the corner from the stables, so she stopped to introduce Hank and ask him about the classes. Stella had already mentioned it and he was more than happy to help.

‘Right now I’ll do anything that isn’t milking a goat or peeling vegetables,’ said Justin gloomily. ‘You could ask me to clean out your septic tank and I’d bite your arm off.’

‘How many weeks left now?’ asked Daisy with a smile.

‘Six,’ replied Justin, looking a little brighter. ‘Or forty days, to be exact. The book is pretty much finished, thanks to your mum. Just got to write the final chapter about what I’ve learnt from the experience.’

‘And what have you learnt, Justin?’ asked Daisy, grinning playfully.

‘Never to sign up for anything this fucking stupid again,’ Justin muttered. ‘I want a quiet life from now on.’

‘Sure you do,’ said Daisy. ‘I’ve just been to see Tom,’ she added, ignoring Justin’s suggestive eyebrow raising. ‘He suggested we all get together to talk about the classes after Christmas. You, me, Stella and Tom. I might invite Will too, see if I can rope him in to doing some videoing for my Instagram. He took loads of great videos while we were skiing, he’s got a real talent for it.’

‘He’s coming to mine for Christmas lunch.’

‘Who, Will?’ asked Daisy, thoroughly confused.

‘No, Tom,’ said Justin. ‘I didn’t want him to spend it alone.’

Daisy ignored the implication that it was somehow her fault that Tom was alone; she had no idea what he’d told Justin, but suspected not very much. ‘I’m spending it with Mum. She’s cooking.’

‘I know,’ said Justin. ‘She told me. But it seems mad to me that you and Stella are in one house, and Tom and me are next door. Why don’t we all eat together?’

Daisy hesitated. The reason was Tom, of course, but she couldn’t tell Justin that. ‘I can’t eat what you’re eating,’ she said with a playful smile. ‘No disrespect, Justin, but even Mary and Joseph’s donkey wouldn’t eat your shitty diet.’

‘I thought I might take a day off,’ said Justin. ‘As long as nobody tells. It’s what the baby Jesus would have wanted.’

Daisy laughed, trying to buy herself some time to think of another excuse. ‘Have you mentioned this idea to Tom?’

‘Yeah,’ said Justin. ‘Yesterday. He was all right with it as long as you were.’ He raised his eyebrows questioningly, but Daisy looked away so he didn’t see her blush. This all felt horribly awkward, but she couldn’t see any way out if Tom was OK with it. And at least it meant not spending Christmas Day alone with her mum, which was a bleak prospect indeed.

‘We’ll come to yours, shall we?’ said Justin, not willing to let this go until he had a firm agreement. Daisy nodded reluctantly, then pulled out her phone to call Stella. The number of people at their Christmas table had just doubled, which meant an emergency trip to Waitrose tomorrow.