Page 116 of But For You

“I know if the guy had surrendered, you wouldn’t have killed him. But he fired at you, so there was no choice. You had to save me, and you had to save yourself. You have kids, Sam. You have me, so there’s no question if you come home; there’s no question if it’s you or someone else. It’s you.”

“I know you’re pissed that I don’t share enough of this crap with you, but when I get home, I’m just so happy to be there … I have you and the kids and the stupid cat, and honestly, I feel so different that my head just isn’t in that place anymore.”

I stared deeply into his gorgeous eyes.

“I swear, I will tell you more. I will work on it. I will. But just walking through the door and seeing all your sweet faces … fixes me. Do you get it?”

“I do now, you big, dumb jerk,” I sighed, smiling at him.

He pulled me forward fast, violently, and the kiss I got was ravaging but abrupt, done before I could sink into it, and then I was outside the car, standing there, dazed and wobbling just a little.

Fortunately, the driver had seen nothing, and he grabbed my bicep tight, walking me down toward the door marked 15.

“How did you first embark on a life of crime?” I asked him, trying to draw him into conversation. “I have kids, so I’d like to keep a lookout for the warning signs.”

After a moment, he turned to look at me. “This is your banter? You’re trying to insult me?”

“Well, I was just saying to my best friend the other day that I think everyone’s life can either be an example or a lesson—don’t you think?”

“Best friend? Who talks like that?” he asked as he opened the door and shoved me through it.

“You don’t have a best friend?” I asked, making a mental note of that, turning to look over my shoulder at him.

“I—”

“No, it’s fine,” I said absently. “God, I wish I had my phone so I could make a list. My memory’s not quite what it used to be.”

“Who the fuck are you?” he asked as he got out his gun from the holster under his jacket and pointed it at me before we walked toward the light.

“I’m just trying to stay calm. Aren’t you nervous?”

He didn’t answer.

“Man, this light I’m walking toward is bright,” I said to Sam and everyone else listening to me. “And that’s not supposed to be a good thing, ya know?”

It was a huge warehouse, but we didn’t go in that far. When we stopped, there were five men there, and I knew one.

“Dr. Dwyer,” I announced.

He tipped his head sideways and squinted, like that wasn’t right. As though I’d made a mistake. And right then, I got it. It took me longer than I would have liked—I prided myself on being quicker.

“Oh,” I breathed out. “You’re Salcedo! That’s brilliant.”

He said nothing, neither to confirm or deny.

“And even talking about yourself to yourself? You’re a genius.”

“Where are the others?” a man asked Mr. Morelos.

“I have no idea. I did my part, and we got outside, and there was nobody there. No car, nobody. They both bailed.”

“You were supposed to be driving.”

“Javi changed the order. He decided to drive, and Cranston was backup in the car.”

Silence.

“Cranston is a marshal. He wouldn’t have bailed.”