Page 98 of I Saw You First

Bianca’s at the media desk talking with a fan.

“Thanks for covering for me,” I say. The fan turns toward me and I gasp. Tamsa! “Tam!” I cry and open my arms for a hug, but she’s rooted to the spot, frowning. “What’s wrong?”

“Nice to meet you,” Bianca says. Then she’s halfway to the front end before I even process that she’s leaving.

“What are you doing here?” I ask.

Tamsa takes a newspaper out of her giant handbag and slaps it down on the media desk. It’s a recent issue of Squall, with a headline that screams at me.

Sexual Harassment Scandal Rocks TC Weekly

I look from the newspaper to Tamsa’s face. Her glittery gold eyeshadow has dulled and there’s mascara smudged under one eye. Her black hair’s twisted up in a claw clip, but a few strands have fallen out, and her blouse is wrinkled. Her features are hardened, her mouth in a thin line.

“Tam, I⁠—”

She cuts me off and jabs at the headline. “You knew, didn’t you? You knew, and you didn’t say anything, not even after I straight up asked you. Is that why you left?”

“No, I—” I clamp my mouth shut as hot, overpowering shame rushes through me.

She shakes her head. “Just tell me the truth. Did you know about this? Is this why you didn’t take the music and entertainment job? You found out what Ryan was doing and you—you just walked away?”

Oh. She doesn’t think⁠—

I shake my head, too. “No, that’s not—Tam, are you okay? Did Ryan do something?”

She releases a high-pitched laugh. “Did he do something? Yeah, he did something. He called me into his office for a ‘review session’ and he—he put his hands where they don’t belong, in a manner of speaking.”

The monster in my gut claws its way all the way up to my throat. I gulp down my nausea. “Tamsa, oh, god, I’m so sorry!”

“So? What? Did they pay you off, too, to keep quiet?”

My eyes widen. Maybe she does know. Maybe she found out somehow what happened in Ryan’s office that day. Maybe she even knows about the check, still in the ashtray after all these months. “What do you mean?”

“My attorney and I have filed a complaint against TC Weekly, and I need to know what you know. It’s not a hard question.”

Oh, but it is. Still. Even though I know it’s happened to Tamsa and so many others, it’s the hardest question I’ve ever had to answer, because admitting it makes it real all over again.

But it’s not something I can talk about here in the middle of the media department at Hometown Electronics. I glance at my watch. We close in ten minutes. “Come with me. I’m going to clock out, and then we’re going across the street for a margarita.”

“No,” Crystal says, “I will not override you at the time clock. You’re the only person in your department. You need to stay.”

Of course Crystal’s going to give me grief, tonight of all nights. “Crystal, this is an emergency. I wouldn’t ask if it weren’t.”

She smirks. “Oh, really? Like the time you told Bergren you had a family ‘thing,’ and you left for an interview?”

My cheeks heat. She would throw that in my face. “I’m serious, Crystal.”

“Tell me what this is really about, and I’ll consider it.”

I stare at her, my eyes narrowed. She lifts her eyebrows at me in a challenge. Bianca and the two customer service reps and a couple of fans watch with rapt attention. Eric and Donnie at the front door, too. And Tamsa’s here. I’ve got to do this without mentioning Tamsa.

“Fine.” I take a deep breath. “I left my last job because I was threatened and sexually harassed, told that I wouldn’t get a promotion if I didn’t show the male editor what I could ‘do with that smart mouth,’ if you get my drift.” Crystal’s jaw drops and I continue, even though my heart’s pounding out of my chest and my mouth is so dry, the words stick together. “I walked out of his office and was let go. I’ve got a check for twelve thousand dollars in my car’s ashtray right now because I can’t bring myself to cash it. Hush money.”

I turn toward Tamsa. Her cheeks have pinked up and there are tears in the corners of her eyes. I’m filled with another rush of feeling, but this time, it’s not shame. It’s my love for Tam and pride in myself for telling the truth.

“This is my friend and former coworker, Tamsa. She stopped by tonight to let me know that a formal complaint has been filed against him by another employee. Before this, I haven’t told a single person what happened that day, but I understand now that I need to share my story in support of… of every other woman who’s dealing with this. So, forgive me if I feel that this is more important than staying a few more minutes to vacuum the media department.”

Crystal stares at me for another moment, then blinks and says, “I’ll clock you out.”