Page 49 of The Last Thing You Said

“Lucy, wait,” Ben calls.

I stop, there’s nothing else I can do. He overtakes me and stands in front of me, his eyes locked on mine. He looks so handsome in his tux, the tie loose around his neck, his curls starting to rebel against whatever product has tamed them today.

“I—I need some air,” I tell him, and I feel like such a fool.

I tuck my chin down so I don’t have to look at him anymore, but he puts one finger lightly under my chin and pulls me up again. I’m afraid he’ll try to kiss me. I’m afraid, and I want it more than anything.

“Okay.”

He reaches for my hand, turns it palm up, and sets the agate in the center. He closes my fingers around it. I hold my breath, wait for him to say something.

Finally, he does. “So that guy, Simon? Is he your boyfriend, then?”

I hesitate before I answer. “Yes.”

For a long moment, he doesn’t say anything. Then his eyes narrow. “Does he know you carry that around with you?”

“What?”

“The agate. Does Simon know you carry the agate around with you?”

“N-no,” I stammer.

“You should be careful, Lucy. You wouldn’t want to give your boyfriend any reason to be jealous.” His words are sharp, mocking.

When I don’t speak, he keeps going. “Not that the agate means anything.”

My stomach twists. His words echo what he said to me in the car that day. He took my already shattered heart and completely obliterated it.

The agate means everything.

I can’t stand to be near him. Five minutes ago, I couldn’t be close enough to him; I wanted him to hold on to me forever. And now—

“You asshole.”

He flinches and he closes his eyes, but not before I see that he’s hurt.

Good. I want him to be hurt.

He turns and walks back into the hotel, and I’m alone on the Lakewalk.

I can’t breathe.

I should be careful? It’s much too late for that. I should have been careful years ago, before Ben broke my heart.

• • •

When I go back into the reception hall, Emily has crashed. She’s on Tami’s lap, her head slumped against Tami’s shoulder, her eyes slits. She wakes, and I take her by the hand to lead her to the elevators, grateful to make my escape.

This isn’t how the night should have gone. Ben should have avoided me like he always does, given Emily any number of excuses not to dance with me.

I open my fist, close it again around Ben’s agate.

Before the elevator reaches our floor, I’ve decided: I won’t give Simon any reason to be jealous.

27 · Ben

She’s right, I’m an asshole.