Page 34 of A Sham Engagement

Edward scrambled to his feet, the battle forgotten. “Please say I can go, please, Papa.” He swung round to Elenora. “I love cows and pigs and chickens and horses. When I’m older, I’m going to be papa’s land agent at Broxbourne Park. So I have to learn lots about how to run an estate. Marylebone Park isn’t like that. It’s lots of farms. But it’s got the nearest cows to us and it’s only at the top of the road, so not far. And I love cows. They have such beautiful eyes.”

Miss Douglas’s eyes widened, no doubt surprised that Jack had allowed Elenora to learn his secret. Well, to discover it. Or was there a part of him that had all along wanted her to know? He nodded. “I’m sure the cows would miss your daily visit if you didn’t go. Ask Cook for some apples to take for them. And put on your coat, Edward, lest you catch cold. And don’t forget to hold Miss Douglas’s hand at all times. The road is busy.”

Edward hopped up and down with excitement. “Thank you, thank you.” And he ran off with Miss Douglas.

Jack stood listening to his noisy departure for a few seconds before returning his gaze to Elenora, waiting for her to come out with her thoughts. Waiting, perhaps, for her disapproval of his secret. Although, probably that wasn’t coming.

She was gazing into his eyes this time, as though all reticence about eye contact had vanished with her curiosity and with her game with Edward. “What a lovely son you have, Jack.” She sounded as though she meant it.

“Thank you. He is a constant joy to me.” How stiff his words sounded. How defensive.

She frowned. “But where did you get him from?” And how literal her question. Her bluntness could be disconcerting.

“You make it sound as though I went to a shop that sells children and chose him there.”

She dimpled. “I didn’t mean to. What I meant was, you haven’t been married. I know that because Aunt Penelope told me. She knows everything about everyone in the Ton. She told Mama you are a confirmed bachelor, much as I plan to be a confirmed spinster. So where does a confirmed bachelor acquire a little boy? And I should say, that even before he called you papa, I could see he was yours as he looks so like you.”

Jack sat down on one of the small table’s two chairs. “If you sit down, I’ll tell you. My mother advised me to be honest and tell you everything, as she thinks our engagement a reality, but I refused, mainly because I didn’t think you needed to know. It seems Edward himself has forced my hand.” But had he? Again, the thought that he’d wanted Elenora to discover his secret, or rather one of his secrets, arose.

Without a word, she sat down, still regarding him intensely as though it took a great effort to do so.

He cleared his throat, awkward as a schoolboy. “You will know that I have had… mistresses. That is common knowledge amongst the Haut Ton. Lady Raby was my latest.” He heaved a breath. “I should tell you at this point that my connection with her has been severed, in order to retain the impression of devotion to you that I would like others to see.”

“You didn’t need to do that on my account.”

Did she mean that? Was there nothing about him that promoted any feeling in her against someone he might have a relationship with? And why was it he wanted her to feel that way? He’d think about that later. “Suffice it to say, that my connection with her is over. It is something I wanted, although it seems she did not. And before her, there have been other women. Not all of them in her situation. Not all of them ladies.”

She was watching him now out of her candid blue eyes as though he was telling her the most fascinating story. She really did have the most beautiful eyes… the blue of bluebells in spring. He’d always liked bluebell time when he’d been a boy at Amberley Castle…

“Go on,” she said. She possessed extraordinarily long, dark eyelashes as well. Unusual in one so fair.

“When I was younger I met an… actress. I thought her quite beautiful. We fell in love. It was not a mere dalliance on my part, nor on hers, or so I thought. But she was far beneath my station and when I raised the question of marriage with my parents, they forbade me from doing so.”

“Why did you have to do what they said?”

An obvious question, but only when it came from her. Why indeed? “Now I look back on it, I don’t know why I did. We have obedience to our parents ingrained into us from the very start, do we not? I wanted my father’s approval, not his approbation. My mother was beside herself with shock that her only son should choose an actress as his bride. I swore I’d do it anyway, without their blessing. But my actress, Mary Warren was her name, refused to marry me. She vowed she could never come between me and my parents, and that she’d rather live as my mistress and have me on speaking terms with my parents.”

“She sounds very selfless.”

“She was.”

“Was?”

He nodded. “Was. She died when Edward was born.”

Tears glimmered in her eyes. “That is so sad.”

He dropped his gaze to his hands where they lay on the table. “Yes.”

Her hand moved across the table toward his, tentative and wary. “I am so sorry you lost Edward’s mother.” Her hand slid over his, small and warm.

Jack heaved a sigh. “It was a long time ago. Edward is seven now. I took charge of him after her death, as she had no immediate family, and found him a wetnurse, then a nurse, and now a governess. My mother was against it at first. She wanted me to put him in someone else’s household to be brought up. She suggested he should grow up as the adopted son of one of our tenant farmers. But I’d given in to her once and was not to be bullied into it a second time.” He looked up. “And in time, she’s come to see him as her grandchild. I’m pretty sure she loves him.”

“Well,” Elenora said, “he is her grandchild. So I suppose if she didn’t feel like that I might not be able to like her. She seems more than a little formidable. But if she loves Edward, then I am determined to like her, despite her questions.”

“I suppose you see yourself as lucky that you won’t have to deal with her beyond this season.”

She frowned. “I suppose so.”