Page 90 of On Your Knees

I huff, frustrated. “That’s what you want to know? Not why I’m choking that guy?”

“Yes, that’s what I want to know, Ethan. What happened?”

“I don’t remember that night very well. I know I lost it. I know Patrick pulled me off that guy a few seconds later. Patrick got me out of there.”

“Did that guy attack you?”

I shake my head. “I agreed to do a scene with him. But then he touched me in a way that…” I close my eyes as my stomach knots. “I don’t remember.”

“Okay,” Levi says soothingly, petting my hair. “I’m sorry for pushing.” He sets the phone down. “Is there anything he can do with this though? I mean, I understand you not wanting it on the internet, of course, but it’s not… criminal.”

“It’s assault,” I reply.

“But the guy must not have pressed charges.”

“I think Patrick convinced him not to. But the real question is where it came from. And what else Jensen might have.”

“So where do you think it came from?”

I huff. “John Clifford. I would bet anything.”

Levi scowls. “But why would he have this? Was he there?”

“I doubt he was there himself. But he was having me watched I’d guess. Collecting shit. For leverage, in case he ever needed it. Like now.”

Levi presses his fingertips to his eyes. “So what do we do?”

“I have to meet with Jensen. I have to know what else he has. I have to find out what he really wants so that I can figure out why Clifford is helping him.”

“Clifford, then. He’s the real danger.”

“You don’t need to worry about him,” I reassure Levi.

“I’m worried about you.”

“I’ll be fine. I just need to focus and figure out what’s going on. I have to stop reacting to everything and just deal with shit. I need to get up.”

“Ethan…”

“Please Levi. I want it over with.”

Reluctantly, Levi draws away from me. Then he squeezes my hand. He leaves the room, walking off down the hallway as though to give me privacy.

I’m glad because it gives me the space to switch gears. I pick up my phone and reply to Jensen, Where do you want to meet?

TWENTY-EIGHT

Levi

I’m not fully aware that I’m making a plan until Ethan is getting ready to leave in the late afternoon to meet Jensen. Up until that point, I only know that things are moving around in my head.

I’m not sure what makes things click into place. Maybe it’s because Ethan calls Patrick over to the house, asking him to stay with me, just in case.

Just in case.

I think that’s when I’m sure. The High Castle Church, especially Ruby, especially John Clifford, will never allow this story to come to light.

Patrick isn’t happy. His arms are tightly crossed and he wants to know why Ethan is meeting Jensen again. They’re in the kitchen, standing about six feet apart. I’m in the doorway.