Page 26 of On Your Knees

At least, that’s what it felt like happened. Maybe I’m wrong. I know that I panicked. I feel like I could panic now. It’s there somewhere, under my skin. I don’t know how to understand what’s happening to my body. But Ethan stays wrapped around me. He’s released his bite on my neck, but he’s still holding my cock and my throat. His face in pressed against my shoulder, and he’s shuddering against me. I sink into that and, slowly, I relax. The panic fades.

When there’s a knock on the door, Ethan growls softly, making me shiver, making me wish he would bite me again.

He straightens instead, pulling me up with him. He releases his hold on me to tug up my underwear and pants. I bite my lip at the brush of cloth against my sensitive dick.

I take over fixing my pants so Ethan can go wash his hands. I cringe at the thought that my cum is on his hands. I made a mess on him.

“I’ll be right back,” he says as he heads toward the foyer.

When he’s gone, I look at the side of the island and jolt at the sight of my cum all over it. I hurry to the sink and snatch a handful of paper towels from the holder, dampening them before I hurry back to my mess. I drop to my knees and start wiping, but Ethan is already coming back. I try to work faster, but it’s everywhere.

“Levi.”

I jump at Ethan’s heavy, disapproving tone. My stomach knots up. I don’t look at him. I just keep cleaning. “I’m sorry—”

“Stop,” he orders. “Right now.”

I freeze, still not looking at him, but I hear his approach. He sets something on the island. It smells amazing, but that only makes me more self-conscious.

Ethan crouches beside me. When he tries to take the wad of paper towels from me, I resist, but he works his fingers under mine. I give in. I let him take over. He wipes up the mess then stands. I expect him to walk away, but he holds out his hand for me. I take it.

I walk with him into the kitchen. He throws away the paper towels then turns on the faucet. He lets me wash my hands then washes his own. I hand him the towel.

He’s studying me. “Why did that bother you?”

I shrug.

“Answer me.”

I swallow hard. “I don’t like when I’m…” I trail off. He won’t like what I want to say, so I just stare down at the tiled floor. That’s why I don’t see him reach for me.

I make a sound of surprise when he tugs me against him, my back to his front. He plants one hand on my groin and the other on my throat in an echo of our earlier position.

He says in my ear, “You’re going to come again and again and again, and there’s nothing gross about it. I will force your body to do it.”

I’m breathing hard. I feel like I’m panicking, but I also feel like I need to hear every word he’s saying.

“Your body is working exactly like it’s supposed to, and there is nothing for you to be ashamed of.”

He holds onto me. I soak it in. I relax against him.

He asks, “Do you understand?”

I nod.

“Good. Now get the food out. It’s dinner time.”

He releases me, and I walk shakily to the island. The paper bag is from a Thai restaurant. I think back. Ethan was on his phone while I was gathering my things. He must have been ordering food. It’s so strange to have someone think about whether or not I’ve eaten.

I start pulling out the containers, shocked at the number. I can’t imagine how much this cost.

Ethan gets out silverware and comes to check on the food.

“This is a lot,” I say.

“I wasn’t sure what you’d like.” He points at one of the boxes. “That one’s pretty plain if you don’t like strong flavor.”

“I do.”