Page 218 of Season Warriors & Wolves

Then I watched fathers, mothers, daughters and sons give each other final goodbye. I watched them struggle to tear their touch from their loved ones. I watched lovers retreat back with small children in their arms, bidding perhaps a forever goodbye. I watched the elderly put on a brave face over their regret and apology as they wished good luck and prayers of return to their children, nieces and nephews.

Kilian reached my side and rested his forehead on mine. We stood there for a while. What did one say at this moment? That I loved him? Would it compensate for the million more times we would have said it if we were to survive today—for the lifetime we promised one another? “In this life and all the next.”

“In this life,” he breathed, reaching for the bowl of white paint and dipping the tip of his finger in it. He drew a line across my forehead and another down my chin—the marks of my tribe. The mark of Myrdur. “First in this life.”

“Kilian—”

“I'm going to have you in this life till we are sick of it. Till we are sick of all the laughter and happiness. I'm going to have you in this life first. I am done losing you. I am done losing each other. I will fight till I cannot fight no more, but I will fight.”

I dipped my fingers in the paint and drew the mark of my people on him. “I will, too.”

“Good.” He kissed me. And it wasn’t a kiss of goodbye. It was lingering with a promise for later. For another. For many others. Unfinished. Incomplete. He unbuttoned the front of his leathers and guided my palm over the paint before resting it on his chest, letting me mark him and feel his heart beat so roughly under my touch. “I will see you out there.”

“Be careful.”

He let go of me and very slowly forced himself to step back. “You forget who I am,” he said, puffing his shoulders and flicking some invisible dust from his black leathers.

“Show-off.”

“You love it.”

“I love you.”

His steps halted and we stood there silently still in the distance. If he came and if he held me again, I would break. So I stepped back too, putting distance between us. “Say it.”

“I’ll say it after this ends.”

With one last smile, he turned round and disappeared between other bodies.

After.

A line of tears traced a hot path down my face.

“After,” I echoed long after he’d gone.

There would be an after.

There would be…an after.

It would.

And I will get to live every single fantasy of mine.

I would not fail today.

Memphis nudged my leg and I bent down to her, showering her with pets, kisses and hugs that I had probably denied her often. “Fly to Olympia.”

Her large yellow eyes shivered and she let out a low yowl that made me regret every moment in this life that I had spent with her and not held her tighter.

“Go,” I said, hugging her to me one last time. “Keep watch over Olympia for me.”

She rested her forehead against mine. Forever your eyes in the skies.

“Forever,” I repeated back, letting her go.

My bonded shifted into an eagle, screeching a high-pitched sound that caused the wind to halt as if in command before she launched towards the blue skies, disappearing into their depths.

“Are you certain about this?” Visha called and I spun to her.