Page 65 of Winter Gods & Serpents

My head dropped, my breath lightly stuttered. This was not the moment to look weak, not the moment to panic. “You wife,” I said straightening. “She used to make us jam scones.”

She did more than that, she would let us weep in her lap, wipe our eyes in her apron, tend to the whip scars on our backs from the Bruma commander because even healers refused to aid our wounds, tell us scary stories of mountain beast to make us forget the real ones and coddle us till we fell asleep by the kitchen fire.

“She did,” Ken replied in a short pained laugh, as if remembering alongside me. “She tried that day as well, to bring them when they found you, but the King would not let her.”

My eyes clutched shut and I bit my lip down from trembling, too painful…too painful. I had heard her, by the doors begging and pleading to give the sweets to just see me.

“I will ask her to make them again,” he offered.

“No, I only ate them because Thora liked them, now they just remind me of her. I don’t want to be reminded.”

Ken sighed leaning onto the table reaching for my hand. “Your sister was sweeter than a scone, don’t make her a bitter memory.”

“It wasn’t her who made them bitter.”

At my words Ken’s eyes darted behind me, possibly towards the Adriatian guard who would have heard everything we’d said.

Softly he patted my shoulder. “You are the one mixing the dough, choose how much salt and sugar, spice and fruit you add into it yourself, don’t let your sweet taint by kneading in whatever they give you. Good night, little fierce one.”

They gave me nothing Ken, they threw them at me, ash, dirt, poison, flame, black steel, and darkness. I tried to shield them away, each mark on my back reminder, but flake after flake made their way onto my bowl. Coated and sprinkled, dressed, and soured those memories.

Nia’s steps sounded approaching me, her hand falling on my shoulder. “I know what you are doing.”

I turned to face her. “One word Nia, just one and I go back to him right now.”

“No, no need. This time you really got him on edge, we wouldn’t want to lose the satisfaction, right?”

“It was selfish of me and very wrong.”

“Don’t, please. It is all fine.”

If one said it is all fine, it truly meant all was fine. The three of us had come up with that, to understand each other better. It was needed, all three of our heads worked so strangely it was impossible to know the truth, but we had settled on acknowledging it loudly.

I gave her a smile. “Now that I am seeing better, you look like the perfect pony for me, let me stroke that mane.”

I stood rapidly, and she took off running away from me.

We took laps around the kitchen chasing one another. I swear our laughter tore the castle silence and had woken everyone up. I had not let laughter fill my chest so mirthfully in a long while, here at the same place where once I’d chased Thora with the same sound.

I caught her, launching us both on the floor.

I held her arms pinned down and she wiggled struggling under me. “You drunk manic.”

“Shall I give you your first kiss,” I teases, smacking my lips together. “I’ll be your whatever charming.”

“What a joke, whatever charming doesn’t kiss, fuck then run away at dawn, he stays. They wake up in each other’s arms, cuddle, kiss again, have breakfast together, hold hands, embrace, speak sweet words to one another.”

“Ugh,” I gaged, and she rolled me over underneath her.

“You know what those are, right? I heard you have a no talking rule too.”

I giggled loudly throwing my head back, indeed I was light weight. “When prince charming starts yapping and moaning about ten types of cheeses he likes his wine within the middle of your fun, tell me then if you would not leash a gag in their mouth.”

Kilian snorted and began coughing loudly from the other side of the room and both of our attention turned to him.

“You can make hells turn prayers to gods, made the poor Adriatian almost choke on air. Get up,” she ordered, moving away from me. She extended a hand and asked cautiously, “Did that really happen, the cheese guy?”

I laughed and nodded.