Page 89 of Shadowing You

Had Ethan?

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Outside, the world turned from pitch black to thin gray. The coal in the stove had burned out sometime during the night. Ethan’s breath clouded the air with every exhale. Outside, a bird was practicing the same two notes over and over.

Mei Lin slept tucked against his side, one hand fisted in the front of his shirt.

He’d been awake for hours, since Mei Lin’s sleepy mumbles had grown louder and sharper. Half asleep, he’d grabbed the flashlight from beside the bed and swung it around the room, looking for whatever had spooked her.

Just another nightmare—she’d never suffered them during two blissful weeks after the wedding and before he’d needed to return to the States. Last night, he’d pulled her close and whispered in her ear. “You’re safe, sweetheart. You’re safe.”

After more whispers and more prayers, she’d settled again, and when he failed to do the same, he watched her sleep. The dim light eased the hollows under her eyes and softened the line between her brows. She looked younger, more like the girl he’d met on that mission trip, competent and confident. She’d learned enough Spanish to communicate, and even when she didn’t know the words, her kindness was multilingual.

After they’d crawled into bed the night before, he’d kissed her. He’d meant for it to be a quick goodnight kiss, but her fingers had slid into his hair, and his breath had caught, and for a few seconds he’d forgotten the cabin and the mountain and all the people tracking them down. He’d forgotten everything.

Half of him wished he hadn’t remembered.

He’d pulled away, kissing her hair and mumbling something about morning coming early.

He hadn’t needed to see her face to know he’d hurt her, but she didn’t ask, just settled against his shoulder and fell asleep.

Before Ethan let their kissing go farther, he needed to tell her about Holly.

He squeezed his eyes shut, imagining how the conversation would go.

While you were in a prison cell, I decided to move on. He worked the sentence over in his head. There was no good version of it. I prayed for you. Then I gave up on you. Then I started seeing somebody else.

The secret was eating at him, and now it was gnawing at the connection between them, the one they were both attempting to rebuild.

He had to tell her today, before they left this mountain, before whatever came next. Mei Lin deserved to know the truth.

The light at the window had gone from gray to silver. More birds had joined the first, creating a symphony.

He felt a shift.

Mei Lin’s eyes were open. She was watching him.

What had she read on his face?

“Good morning.” His voice was croaky, and he cleared it.

“Hi.”

“We should move.”

“Mm.” She let her eyes drift closed. “Must we?”

“I’m afraid so.” He pushed up onto his elbow. “I’ll deal with the stove. Can you start packing?”

“Okay.”

They got up and changed into warmer clothes. While Mei Lin folded the blanket, Ethan banked the coal and swept the ash, then filled the water bottles from the barrel. He put the protein bars and what remained of the candy in her backpack, in case they got separated.

He stared at the map on the wall and tried to commit it to memory. He had a plan…or the first half of a plan, anyway. Or maybe the first quarter. Tenth.

Whatever. He had a direction. He snapped a picture of the map, though he doubted it would help much.

Mei Lin had frozen.