Page 23 of Shadowing You

Mei Lin’s other words had been gone before he could identify them.

When he’d first fallen for her, he’d started learning Mandarin, wanting to understand her better. Not literally—her English was excellent. But language and culture were linked. If he didn’t at least have a cursory understanding of Mandarin, how could he truly know the woman he loved?

When he’d given up ever seeing her again, he’d deleted the language app from his phone. If he’d had any idea…

He’d have done a lot more than learn her language. He’d have found her and brought her home. He’d have done anything to protect her.

He definitely would have ignored all the people who told him to move on.

He couldn’t think about that right now. There’d be plenty of time to beat himself up for everything he’d done and hadn’t done once they were safely out of China.

Mei Lin had grown restless a couple of times. Her breathing had sharpened, and once, her fist had clutched the sheet. She’d curled up as if protecting herself from something, or someone.

Ethan had calmed her. He wasn’t sure if it’d been his hand on her shoulder or his voice telling her she was safe, but she’d settled again.

One time, around three, her eyes had opened and met his. “Not yet,” she’d said in perfect English. “Please, don’t leave me yet.”

“I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart, ever. I promise.”

He didn’t know if she heard him or if she’d been awake at all. Within seconds, she was sleeping soundly again.

Ethan tossed the empty pastry wrapper into a trash can. It was torture, being with her but not being able to ask her questions. Studying her face—still beautiful despite the dark circles and sunken cheeks—but not hearing her voice or seeing her eyes, or understanding anything.

A little after seven, she shifted in the bed. He stared at her, waiting, praying she’d wake up.

And then she blinked a couple of times and sat up abruptly. “You’re here.”

“Where else would I be?” He sat on the edge of the bed and smiled. “How you feeling?”

As if she’d used too much energy already, she settled back against the pillows. “Okay, I think.”

“You were pretty tired.” It wasn’t easy to keep the concern out of his voice. “When was the last time you got a good night’s sleep?”

Her head tilted on the pillow. She focused on him as if she were seriously contemplating the question. “January of twenty-twenty.”

Twenty-twenty…what? Twenty-five? Twenty-four?

But she was done.

She’d quit communicating with him on January seventeenth of that year, just as the pandemic had gained ground in China. She’d been working extra shifts at the hospital to try to deal with the influx of patients. She’d been tired and busy, but she’d never gone a day without texting or calling him.

And then…nothing.

“Six years ago?” He kept the words lighthearted. “That explains why you slept so long.”

Her eyes widened. “Too long? I’m sorry. I should not⁠—”

“It’s okay. I’m glad you slept.”

“I shouldn’t have… I’m sorry.” She scooted back as if she’d just remembered he was a threat.

Ignoring the fury that kicked the bottom out of his stomach, he lifted his hands, palms out. “Mei Lin, it’s fine. You’re fine. You don’t have to apologize to me.”

“Okay.” She pulled the blanket up like a shield. “I’m sorry.”

Stifling a sigh, he stood and backed toward the door. “I assume you need the bathroom.” When she said nothing, just looked at him with that terrified expression, he pointed at the sack of things he’d bought the day before. “Change clothes, if you want. I’m going to start breakfast. Are eggs all right?”

She blinked, her eyes wide. “I can do it. You don’t have to⁠—”