Page 51 of Between Ghosts and Gods

Kasu spluttered in impotent rage.

“You do not see that,” the Pale Lady said. “You and your mistress share the same flaw.”

“What does Lady Camellia have to do with anything?”

“Lady Camellia is like you. A fool who puts her faith in all the wrong things. The wrong person. It’s amusing watching her make the same mistakes over and over again. Amusing and pathetic.” The Pale Lady waved a dismissive hand, drawing their discussion to a close without giving Kasu the chance to ask any further questions.

Kasu could tell that the demon’s patience was at an end. It was time to go.

They were lucky to be leaving with their lives. Kasu knew that she shouldn’t have said half of the things she had. Lady Camellia certainly wouldn’t have been as tolerant.

“Thank you for taking the time to speak to us.” She bowed.

As she pulled Arun out of the tent, Kasu glanced back at the demon lord.

The Pale Lady smiled and the moths covering her eyes shook their wings with glee.

Chapter Twenty-Five Kasu

They returned to Camellia House in silence. Kasu trailed a few steps behind Arun, lost in thought. She didn’t want to admit it, but their meeting with the Pale Lady had shaken her. A god willingly leaving the heavens to become a demon. Why? And what had she been trying to say about Lady Camellia?

It shouldn’t have been bothering her as much as it did. Letting a demon’s lies affect her was proof of the weakness in her heart. Why should she be so unsettled by the Pale Lady’s claim, unless, deep down, she didn’t have complete and utter faith in the Heavenly Principles? As soon as she returned to Camellia House, she would meditate on how to be better.

Once they reached the edge of the shadow forest, Kasu parted ways with Arun and made her way up to the dormitory. Ever since the search for Sunan had begun, she had neglected her studies of the Heavenly Principles. She dug out the books she kept to one side in the closet, beneath the bedding. She had picked them up from an old market stall selling junk. They had probably been intended for kindling, but instead of using them as fuel for a fire, Kasu had read them, and they had changed her life.

After perusing the list of Heavenly Principles, she meditated.

Taking a deep breath, Kasu settled on the reed floor and pressed her back against the closet door. Ignoring the snoring of the other ghosts sharing the dorm, she closed her eyes and returned to her place of comfort. To her dream of her next life.

A small house on the edge of an apple orchard. The touch of sunlight on her skin. Someone waiting for her on the porch. Someone waiting for her to come home.

Sometimes, Kasu found herself rendered breathless by the violence of her longing.

She wanted to be reborn.

The only way to do that was to fulfil her contract with Lady Camellia and impress the heavens with her deeds. She had to prove she was no longer the same thoughtless girl who would sell her soul for a jade pendant.

Her mother’s fingers dug into Kasu’s shoulders so deep it hurt.

“Please. Do this for me. Do this for your sister. It’s the only way.”

Kasu glanced over to the mound of straw the three of them shared as a bed. There was someone lying there, limbs pale and thin.

Her sister. Kasu gasped. She remembered a small girl with dark hair and dark eyes and a smile like sunshine.

There was a corpse inside her home.

It lay on the straw bed with its eyes open, glassy and unseeing. At some point, dogs had come in through the unsecured door—

“STOP!”

Kasu surged to her feet. Her nails bit into her palms, almost drawing blood.

Someone hit her in the face with a pillow.

“Shut up, Kasu! Go have a nightmare somewhere else!”

Kasu remained standing, frozen. Though her breathing evened out, it did not calm her thundering heart.