Page 20 of Second Chance Saloon

For ten years, she had traveled the world, admired the views, enjoyed meaningless connections with people who she knew wouldn’t give a damn about her when she left. And she always left—that was the one constant. Whether after weeks or a few months, she moved on. Staying too long in one place created bonds, and she had been running away from those ever since she had left the one guy she never forgot.

Jackie had been naively hoping that the pain and bone-deep regret would eventually go away. Instead, they latched on to her heart and soul, like parasites feeding off every memory, every time she thought about her life before. Because that was how Jackie regarded her life: before she left Mitch, and after. The after was like a rusty anchor weighing her down, dragging her to the bottom of an ocean.

She hadn’t realized she had started crying. Annoyed at her fragile body, so quickly overrun with heightened emotions she’d buried a decade ago, she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand.

Year by year, the gaping hole Mitch left in her heart had been patched over by new experiences, memories, even flings. Distractions. But there had never been anyone else who had been real. She hadn’t fallen in love again. What was the point? It would only lead to misery.

If she let herself take the steel guardrail off her emotions and unlock their depths, she’d have to admit that she missed everything about Mitch. He had been the best thing that had ever happened to her. And she’d ripped it all to shreds, threw it into a bonfire, poured gasoline on it and dropped a match like it had meant nothing.

She pulled her legs to her chest, pressing her forehead to her knees. He must’ve hated her so much, she realized. He had good reasons. They talked about forever, made all the plans for their life after college …

Jackie opened her mouth, letting out a soundless scream. There was no anger left in her. This one thing—one huge mistake she’d never forgive herself for—had consumed all of it years ago. Her emotional reserves had been running dry ever since.

Don’t think about it. Don’t torture yourself. It’s all in the past. It is an awful coincidence that he’s here. He’ll leave soon, and you won’t see him again. That’ll be it—forever, this time.

She straightened her back, feeling something pop as she inhaled sharply. Logic pushed its way back at the forefront of her mind, reminding her of one crucial thing she had almost forgotten in all the self-pitying wallowing.

Mitch was here on his honeymoon. Even though he didn’t get married, he had wanted to. He had found someone else to share all his dreams with.

Acid rose in her throat. Did he leave his fiancée handwritten letters as well? Did he bring her pink roses every other Friday?

She’d known, of course, that he’d meet someone else. It had been so long. She shouldn’t have been surprised. And yet … Yet something heavy pressed against her chest like a stone wall.

It was supposed to be her. He was supposed to be hers; she was supposed to be his. Before it all got fucked up.

Jackie jumped to her feet when she heard a firm knock. Wiping away tears which had already started drying on her face, she pinched her cheeks to snap herself out of whatever daze she had been in and opened the door to find Rea.

Concern lined Rea’s face and glinted in her brown eyes. She peered over Jackie’s shoulder, into her room. “Are you okay, Miss van Moetlier?”

Jackie forced a smile. “Of course. I needed to come up and get changed … I noticed there was some dirt on my shirt.”

Rea’s brow rose skeptically but she kept her mouth shut.

Jackie stepped out into the corridor and closed the door behind her. Her room was always one of the guest bedrooms. When she first started working at van Moetlier’s hotels, she wanted to stay in the staff accommodation, but it soured the atmosphere, with everyone tiptoeing around her. Now, she took one of the guest rooms, eager to avoid awkwardness.

“Did everything get sorted with that new guest? There’s an airport shuttle soon, perhaps we could help him arrange a return flight and send him on his way,” Jackie said.

“A return flight?” Confusion scrunched Rea’s features. “No, he changed his mind. He said he’s more than happy to stay the full two weeks with us. Said he doesn’t even mind the honeymoon suite.”

Jackie gritted her teeth, balling her hands into fists by her sides. “Of course he doesn’t,” she muttered under her breath.

Damn you, Mitch.

Why couldn’t he make her life infinitely easier and go back to where he came from? How was she going to manage all those big feelings, laced with regret and memories, if he was sleeping under the same roof?

“After you left, he didn’t seem as drunk or out of it as we initially thought. He’s quite charming, actually.” Rea looked down, a blush covering her cheeks.

Jackie sighed. Trust Mitch Craigton to woo her unsuspecting hotel staff with his stupid dimples, gorgeous green eyes and that obnoxious cowboy hat, which he’d grown into even more since she had last seen him.

Her lungs deflated as she recalled his perfectly corded muscles, broad arms, hard chest … From what she’d gleaned downstairs, the cowboy hat wasn’t the only thing looking better with age.

“Fine. He can stay,” she told Rea. Then she caught the strange way Rea was studying her and added: “I mean, I’m glad he decided to stay. And that it’s all sorted.” She shuffled her feet awkwardly, wishing she could be anywhere else.

Rea must’ve sensed her discomfort, as she nodded eagerly and fumbled with her pocket, taking out a phone and scrolling through something on the screen. “I need to go check if everything’s ready at the beach for Room 409’s proposal.”

“Oh. I forgot about that.” Jackie winced. Apparently, everyone was falling in love left, right and center, and here she was: reliving a heartbreak of her own making. “Throw in a bottle of Dom Pérignon 2015 from the hotel, with our congratulations.”

Rea eyed her suspiciously. “You’re sure?”