Page 64 of Falling

To keep Miles. Because that was the thing. The library was important to the community, I got that.

I’d never set foot in it before he’d arrived, though. Miles was important to me.

I didn’t want to face the possibility of losing him over this. I wouldn’t.

“It’s gonna be okay,” I said, firmer this time. Whatever it took, I’d make it okay.

I’d just found what I’d been telling myself I hadn’t been looking for all these years. I wasn’t losing it to an obstinate town council or a budgeting decision. Not while there was still any way to fight.

“I get why you gave up being a lawyer, but I bet a lot of people felt a lot more confident having you handle their case,” Miles said, sighing. “I believe you.”

“Good,” I responded. I turned my head just far enough to breathe in the smell of his shampoo. I wanted to pull him into my lap and hold him as tight as I could while we waited, but this was obviously enough for him. If it was enough for him, it was enough for me.

I could be patient. I’d waited all this time already.

“Besides,” I continued. “The universe owes me one. I’m turning forty tomorrow.”

The party was tonight, since the bar would’ve been closed anyway and that meant I wasn’t interrupting anyone’s plans by closing it for a private party. Not that most of Otter Bay wasn’t invited, anyway.

“Shit, yeah,” Miles mumbled, tongue thick with exhaustion. “Happy birthday.”

“Don’t rush me,” I teased. “I’m not forty yet.”

Miles chuckled. “Looks good on you. More men should be forty.”

“Most will be at some point,” I pointed out, keeping my voice low so I wouldn’t startle Miles out of the doze he was starting to fall into. “Even you, one day.”

“You can wish me happy birthday a day early when I do,” he said.

I opened my mouth to respond before the words hit me. When they did, I couldn’t get any of my own out.

He was planning to be here at forty. Twelve years from now. With me?

I knew it wasn’t a promise of forever or a declaration of undying love, but that it was so easy for him to say still meant something to me. Miles could imagine still being part of my life that far in the future.

If I hadn’t been determined to save the library before, I was now.

Miles’s breathing slowed as he leaned against me, body going limp as he drifted off again. If leaning on me made him feel safe enough to nap under the circumstances, he could nap for as long as he wanted. Even if my butt was threatening to fall asleep.

Miles stayed where he was until Seth burst into the library, face split into a grin that looked bigger than he was from where I was sitting.

“They’ve doubled our budget.”

I hadn’t really expected Miles to show up to my birthday party after the weekend he’d had, but I couldn’t pretend I wasn’t thrilled he was here. That after everything—including the scramble to allocate twice as much money as he’d budgeted for in the first place—he was still here to celebrate with me.

He’d dressed up for it, too, in charcoal tailored pants and a black velvet blazer over a fitted emerald sweater vest that showed off his tiny waist and made his eyes sparkle.

He’d given me two gifts when he arrived—a small rectangular package that turned out to be a copy of The Iliad, since I’d had to admit I’d never actually read it despite getting the joke about his car’s name, and a gift bag, taped closed, that he’d told me I wasn’t allowed to open until later.

“You look great for forty,” Seth said, jerking me back to reality when I’d been staring a little too long at Miles laughing and talking with Ryder, the two of them comfortably snuggled up together.

Another man might’ve been jealous, but I could see he was happy. He was the kind of person who loved physical contact with his friends, and I was so glad to see him enjoying it. Besides, Ryder was devoted to Ward the way swans mated for life. There was no universe in which he’d ever consider anyone else.

“Thanks,” I said wryly, accepting the drink Seth passed me. “What is this?”

“Sparkling lemon water,” Seth said. “I’m under orders to keep you mostly sober.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Mark?” I asked.